For you my love

I wake up from the emptiness in my bed, and i stretch my arms out for you. You aren't here. Nothing but darkness.
I shove my head into your pillow but your smell, it isn't there... It's completely gone.
I try to sniff harder but nothing, all i can smell its me, i cant feel you with me.. Your existence is slowly fading away and becoming a memory.
I lazily turn to stare at the darkness of my room as i feel hot tears running down my cheeks.
I check my clock through blurry eyes.
3 am.
There is nothing worse than the memories that leave you broken and wishing you were dead.

Flashback.

"Your wife's cancer has spread a lot infecting her heart. There isn't much we can do about her sir , we don't thing she will survive the night. I'm sorry." I felt my whole world crash at my feet as the doctor spoke about her. Every word was like a dagger twisting deep into my soul. The doctor kept talking but my mind was numb, everything was in slow motion. I couldn't breathe, my lungs were burning and my heart felt like it had stopped. I couldn't hear or feel anything around me.
I don't know how Or when I got to my wife's room.
There she was..
All beautiful, like an angel in a very white room. An angel ready to fly.
"Hey" -her weak voice woke me up from my musings.
"Hey gorgeous, how ya feeling?"- i said trying to act playful.
"Im not gorgeous"-she laughs-" look at me, im a mess. The chemo and cancer have.."
"I am looking and i see the most beautiful thing in the world"- I interrupted her as I sat near her squeezing her hand and kissing her forehead tenderly.
"I love you"- I whispered in her ear as i tried to hold back the tears.
"Is something wrong?"- she said grabbing my chin and making me look into those beautiful blue eyes. They used to be so full of life but now, now they are hollow and tired.
"Nothing darling. The doctor said you are improving"
Stop it stop it you idiot, stop lying to her. But it didn't matter, she knew it too. She understood.
"Soon we are going against the world again. Just you and I. I'll bring the world to your knees babe, I'll kill for your smile, I'll die for your love." - I smiled gently and kissed her lips.
"I love you too my heart and with or without me you are going to concur the world."
"Hmm"-I answer while nuzzling her neck and hugging her tight but carefully. I didn't want the world without her. Hell , she was my world.
"Very eloquent hun"- she slurred the words out. The medicines were kicking in. She was going to sleep.
"Hah, just the way you love me right?" I looked at her for an answer or something but she was already asleep..
Right darling?
I couldn't hold my tears anymore and started crying,shaking her frail figure.
She fell asleep to never awake again.


Many people search for years for the one, for that one of a kind love that you find in the movies.
And I found that.
I loved a woman so much that losing her killed me. I can never be the same. I may love again but I'll never be in love again. Im just waiting for my body to die just like my soul.
Im waiting to see her again. To see my angel again.