Reality TV Shows.

As I strolled down the street, I could see the COPS go speeding past with sirens sounding out and lights flashing. I stopped to ponder who had made that EMERGENCY CALL to the RESCUE 911 squad, Back in THE REAL WORLD, I knew that would be my DREAM JOB, But only the ROAD RULES would have kept me being THE APPRENTICE.
As I walked further along the STREET, MATE, who is a down to earth AVERAGE JOE, working as THE ASSISTANT at THE CASINO, He tells me he had been on a BLIND DATE last night, with a TEEN MOM, who works at THE SALON,
They went to the local nightclub THE SCHOLAR where it was JUST THE TWO OF US he said, they danced the DIRTY DANCING to HIT ME BABY ONE MORE TIME. But AGAINST ALL ODDS, I would rather be SEDUCING CINDY I thought, who works with DOG THE BOUNTY HUNTER down on GEORDIE SHORE.
He goes on to tell me that she has 19 KIDS AND COUNTING, Wow! I thought is she on THE QUEST to start THE COLONY back up again, WHODUNNIT ?, “KING OF THE NERDS” that must be a real MAD MAD HOUSE down on THE FARM in WEED COUNTRY.

BACK TO REALITY and I remember I have THE RENOVATORS working in my MONSTER HOUSE, they are working to a DEADLINE of just 30 DAYS , I had to call them in because I had BOTCHED the CHANGING ROOMS.
So I had to move into my MONSTER GARAGE, which was just SCARE TACTICS for my next VICTIM to get PUNK'D.
So I leave the RESTORATION to THE OSBOURNES , and go for something to eat at the local TAKE ME OUT which is called the DUCK DYNASTY, which is next to MIAMI INK on COLLEGE HILL hopefully it will be OPENING SOON , SNOOKI & JWOWW are the best, TOP CHEF's, who originate from HELL'S KITCHEN, they enjoy THE SIMPLE LIFE, PERFORMING AS...TOTAL DIVAS.

Some weekends I like to ride my AMERICAN CHOPPER, whom I have nicknamed AUDRINA. As I head out to THE CITY I ride past the HOUSE OF CARTERS and RUN'S HOUSE, Who is the BIG BROTHER to ROB & BIG, These two are a pair of real ODDITIES they studied at the TOOL ACADEMY(they should have gone to the CHARM SCHOOL though). They like to work in my MONSTER GARAGE, so i asked them to PIMP MY RIDE, When they are finished, I will be entering THE AMAZING RACE, which is an 100 HOURS ENDURANCE race my aim will be to BEAT THE CLOCK, which will be a THRILL OF A LIFETIME.
Meanwhile down on JERSEY SHORE, Which as got to be one of the SCARIEST PLACES ON EARTH, There were SIGHTINGS of MY BIG FAT OBNOXIOUS FIANCE drinking BUG JUICE with OUTBACK JACK in JAMIE'S KITCHEN, Which is just off 8th AND OCEAN.
As I head out to THE HILLS, I pass THE REAL HOUSE WIVES OF NEW JERSEY whose husbands ( the AX MEN) are working on REDNECK ISLAND as part time TREASURE HUNTERS.
The island is located in SYLVANIA WATERS, which is the home of a monster beadle called FRESHWATER BLUE. In this DOG EAT DOG world, where there are a lot of BEADLE'S ABOUT, I asked the local DOG WHISPERER for help, he shouts out " HERE COMES HONEY BOO BOO", the BEAR WHISPERER, with news of his latest DEADLIEST CATCH. He invited us all to THE RESTAURANT to feast on his big catch. But the cook had a huge KITCHEN NIGHTMARE, If only he had gone to the CHEF SCHOOL it might of tasted...JERSEYLICIOUS!!