Living on the Edge

So why the provocative title? Am I about to describe a hair-raising motorcycle sortie? Or some other foolish misadventure architected to enable us senior citizens feel forever young? Well, you be the judge.

Teaching a fifteen year old teen-aged boy how to drive a car for the first time is not for the faint of heart, but teaching our grandson Isaiah how to do so has been nothing but a delight--mostly.


While we've been thoroughly enjoying the company of our grandson while enabling him to gain some early driving experience, lest we forget what it was like when each of us first got behind the wheel of one of those steel behemoths, I am now reflecting on a few adventures and misadventures of a control freak like me not only "passenging" instead of driving, an unnatural act in and of itself, but relinquishing control of the wheel to a true neophyte.

After reviewing some fundamentals while still stationary and before igniting the motor, like where the turn signal controls are, how to start the car, using a hand over hand motion when turning the wheel, how to properly adjust the mirrors and seat before starting to roll, and other such basic knowledge, it was time to fire up this baby and go from "P" to "D" (gulp).

Our very first issue was that of over-confidence. Huh? Yeah, driving looks so easy, so being vigilant over the myriad details of driving safely tended to be taken for granted. After all, how can you look cool and smooth like Paul Walker in "Fast 'n Furious" by doing geeky stuff that safety seems to dictate? Isn't looking over your shoulder once when first starting out sufficient for the whole trip? Well, no, actually. Aren't speed limit signs more suggestions than anything else, particularly when there isn't any other traffic around anyway? Why isn't aggressive acceleration around curves always acceptable? Do I really have to stop when told to do so? Yes, as outlandish as it may seem, son, there may just be a reason for doing so that isn't part of your new driver's knowledge base yet! Is that even possible? Uh-huh, kiddo.

Once the real driving had commenced, our new driver hopefully learned a few important lessons over the course of a few hours driving practice out on the streets which has spanned just a few hours over a couple of days so far:

1. How to stop on red for a right turn without hitting the old man on the bicycle. Good thing HIS brakes and reflexes obeyed his command, despite his advanced years!
2. Why the practice of shifting the transmission out of "drive" and into "park" AFTER getting out of the vehicle and observing it rolling away without a driver is NOT the preferred method of parking the vehicle!
3. After driving in the rain, do not leave the lights on when you leave the car overnight! That clicking sound when attempting to start the car is not the sound you're going for,
4. Cross traffic doesn't always stop when it's supposed to, so do not assume that it will. Example yesterday: that blind cement truck driver needed a horn to remind him that HE needed to stop, etc. A good example why when your driving instructor tells you to stop, you darn well better do so. Also, an example of a situation where your instructor's boxer shorts may need changing after practice is concluded,
5. How to position the car for pumping gas and how to pay for your own gas. Might as well start paying now and learning that the more you put your foot into the gas pedal, the faster that expensive gasoline evaporates.

Yes, I believe "we" (the royal "we") learned some valuable lessons over the past couple of days, and it is all too easy to forget our first driving experiences. I was grateful for these reminders, and for the opportunity to help Isaiah learn these lessons in a more or less controlled environment.

Don't get me wrong, though. He performed admirably for the most part, far better than I did when I first planted my carcass behind the wheel of a car at age fifteen. But to only describe what he did well would have made for a boring article.

We're proud of Isaiah, and grateful for the quality time we have spent with him while we're here in Minnesota.

Great job, Isaiah!

And of course what would driving lessons be without the tension-relieving shopping sprees and meals at our favorite eateries afterwards? Grandparents' prerogative!