Inhaling Happiness Sweat

My day started as most other days do. The difference was I needed batteries and decided to try my luck at Samco. They always seem to have better deals as long as you’re willing to buy more than you’ll use in a year. When I arrived I showed my card at the door and made my way toward the endcap I knew would contain the object of my trip.
I noticed a crowd of people gathered near my goal and asked someone standing on the outskirts of said crowd what was going on?
“There’s a happy in the middle of that crowd. These people are going nuts,” she answered. “I’d try to get in there but I don’t think I could make it.”
A “happy” is someone who always seems to be happy. Not long ago scientists discovered these “happies” give off a sweat scent that can make others happy. I’ve never really thought about but this is the first time I’ve been close enough to a happy to give it a sniff.
Without hesitation I pushed my way into the crowd. I’m not overly big or strong but I’m determined. I soon reached the poor happy at the center of the crowd. It was a man and he was being weighed down by the crowd. I saw he was on his knees and seemed to be heading for the floor. My first instinct was to grab him and help him to his feet. I wrapped my arms around him and started to lift. I then inhaled. It was like sweet ambrosia. My arms tightened around him and I was transported to sunny meadow in the spring. Flowers bloomed around me and butterflies filled the air. It was intoxicating to say the least.
By the time the police broke the “happy storm” as they called it, I was so happy I fell to the floor and laughed. When I came to my senses I was locked in a jail cell with others of my ilk, “Happiness Drunks”. I had to call my wife to come down to the police station to bail me out. I told the police officer at the front desk that this was my first time but he shook his head and gave me my court date.
I’m not sure how my court appearance will go but I do know this will not be my last time. With one long sniff I’ve become a happiness junkie. Being happy, it seems, is now my life’s goal.