Special Delivery

I’m observing you for months now, following you in the shadows. I admire your perfection, your style, your every movement. The passion I feel toward you cannot be achieved by anyone else. Nobody can love you, want you, possess you with such passion as I do. That is why I follow you every night and every day, living into your shadow enjoying those glances, thrown randomly in my direction. I know you don’t know me, but it doesn’t matter. Even the simple act of watching as you move, as you live in this world, leaves me with a feeling of complacence that almost rise to omnipotence. For you I would do anything, no mountain that I wouldn’t climb, nor walls that I wouldn’t break, for you.

And yet, in these last few weeks, I’ve been seeing you act differently from what I was used, You managed to enlighten everything around you with your aura of happiness, a brilliant light of ecstasy emerging from your eyes, as if you were on the verge of an explosion of happiness. In those days I wondered what had changed, what could have been the reason, the source of this happiness of yours.

Until I saw you, today, together with Him.

You have given your smile to another man, gifting yourself with happiness to Him. Your radiance, your passion, everything that made you what you are, was given unto Him without any hesitation.

You surrendered to Him without any fight.

Why?

You have ignored me, and I was more than happy to live in your shadow, to taste a trembling passion sourcing from your daily living, even without my presence to interfere with your own. But you preferred the welcoming arm of a man unknown to me, your virgin purity sold to the first who entered into your life?

I’ve been gnawing at my hands as I watched the two of you, closed together on the bed of your own house, under the bedsheets, busy in the frenetic dance of love and sex. I watched you two and I’ve hated you, Him for the easiness with which had He conquered you and you…You!

You that have damned my soul, leashing it to yourself, and now seem to enjoy in torturing it!

You God-damned Bitch!

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I’ve been following you, seated here, at the driving wheel of my own car, looking as you have fun in your pretty little house. It’s a nice place, only a ground floor, with a garden which you tend to every day. You stopped working since He entered your life, losing yourself in the anonymity of the role to which you have been relegated.

The House-wife.

You prepare for Him delicious meals, seating beside Him when he comes back from his Job and you enjoy the privacy of the night with Him.

But not always.

No, often He doesn’t return home, if only at the early morning.

‘The Job’ He may tell you, ‘Client’s meeting has gone late’ maybe…But you don’t know the truth.

You know nothing of the prostitutes that he uses when he doesn’t return home, of the parties and the orgies to which he participate, as you remain home, waiting worriedly for Him, saddened by his harsh day at work. I thought of coming to you to reveal this truth, to force you to watch the reality of the situation but, you wouldn’t believe me. You’re lost to Him,

You are His slave.

He order and you obey.

Grab the ball.

Fetch the wood staff.


Open your legs.



I scream in my mind, shouting to you to wake up and to find him out, to return being the Goddes you once were, the independent woman who was proud to be so.

But you don’t do it.

And my heart start breaking apart, as rips and tears begin to appear on its surface, crushing it and breaking it, as I see you so different from what you were. I miss your confused glances, your smiles, the confidence in yourself that you had with you and that you brought wherever you went.

I can’t let the situation to be as it is.

You must return to be what you once were, or I will not have another choice…

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Seasons has gone away , a year since I saw you for the first time, in winter as you got out of the taxi that had brought you at the city center. Then you were a Goddess, now you’re only a filthy representation, a pathetic doll trying to simulate the beauty that you once possessed.

You found him guilty, you found out what he did with the other women and, for a moment, I thought you would have abandoned Him.

Instead you followed Him, you lost that last tiny speck of Light that still radiated from you, as you joined in his parties, in his obscene orgies. You throw yourself at open arms in the sinful dark pit, ready to pay any price to remain with your Master.

That is why I’m here, tonight.

I shall lead you away from those sinful ways and show you the harsh, terrible road for redemption.

I get out of the car, the snow on the road creaks under my heavy boots as I walk toward the door of your house, clenched tightly in my hands a package, on the top of which are visible some flowers. I can’t do anything else than moving closer to you, hiding behind the mask of a courier, to try and attract your attention.

I’ve got to take you away from this place of corruption and damnation.

I hit the door heavily, as a sensual music rise from within the walls behind this door. I knock repeatedly, until I see the handle turning and the door opening.

And you appear before me.

You seem drunk, looking at me with eyes covered in the fog originated from foul chemical substances, wearing only some vermillion piece of lingerie. You are barely able to talk, as the flumes of damnation emerge from your corrupted body.

For a moment I lose all control, looking at you so visibly corrupted, shaking vigorously as I see your disheveled face, as a white slimy substance leaks from your almost closed lips. You speak but I can’t hear your voice, too stunned to be able to understand you. Realizing that, even though I’ve watched you from afar and I knew what to expect, the reality of meeting you like this is beyond my worst fears.

As I stay motionless, too freaked out to do anything, you keep stuttering phrases without any sense, only to turn around and move away, returning toward your lair of sins and vices.

You leave me on the door, without even thinking of closing it.

I pray silently, as I move through the house, following the perverse sound of pleasure that rise around me. I let the package fall to the ground, but not its true content, clenching it tightly in my hands as I near a door.

Excited voices seem to erupt from the dark abyss hiding behind this pure surface, moaning, cries, roars of approval.

I can’t go back.

I cannot stop myself from the duty that I’ve given to me.

Slowly I lower my hands, clenched on the tool that will purify these perversions from your life.

I close my eyes, unable to keep my tears.

Forgive me for my weakness…I should have intervened before all of this…





The door explode in a whirlwind of wooden pieces, the ferocious roar of the weapon I hold in my hands covering all the lascivious moans and the sensual music in the room. My stare wander around the room, to all the parties in this orgy. Some are on the floor, their naked supple bodies trembling as white drool emerge from the lips as they take their last breaths. Others appear to be lost in themselves, gone from this world due to unholy chemical substances obscuring their senses.

Under my own eyes I see you prostrating yourself on the ground, turned toward the Man that up to moments ago was occupied with perverted acts toward one of the girls which mind is far away from this life.

He looks at me terrified.

He has no idea on who I am, He can’t even imagine the fury that lies within me as I know that it was Him that has corrupted you but, he sees the weapon in my hands and lay motionless and wordlessly as I point the gun to him.

I do not talk, letting my shotgun to roar my rage, expelling tiny spheres of screaming metal that chop, cut and tear the partecipants of this orgy. Many of these do not even realize what is happening to them, passing from life to death in the blink of an eye.

The killing continue until only three are still breathing.

On the bed, half buried from still warm bodies, there is Him, the Corruptor.

Him that is staring at me in a terrified paralysis, crying and moaning for mercy. The other one it’s Her, my only Love.

Kneeled, the body covered in warm streaks of blood, she laugh as she bring the crimson liquid to her lips, believing to be doing a new perverse game.

My vision is obscured by tears as I see you changed into this thing. As I hear the shrill whining of the sirens from the outside. I’ve got to stop this evil and corrupted act, extinguish this virulent cancer before it can grow somewhere else.

The fierce roar of the shotgun fills my ears again, only to be substituted by the gurgles and the moans of the Corruptor, as He slowly meet his suffering end, his mangled remains crumpling on the bed and on the bodies of those who had died before him.

For a few moments I stare at his remains, hoping to be able to burn them properly and then, I turn towards you. My finger is ready, as the barrel of the shotgun point directly towards you as you, still prey of the drugs, place your hand on it, guiding it toward your lips, as if giving to it a job with your mouth. I can see your tongue moving around until you realize this is not something to which you have been accustomed to.

And as I stare at you I would like to flex my finger, to purify you from the evil that has filled your life but, I can’t.

Tears running from my face, as I realize I cannot hurt you.

Selfishness? Maybe.

But I cannot take away from the world your smiles, your beauty, your wonderful life. And even though you have fallen, deep in the darkness and the depravation, and should be my duty to kill you…I can’t.


Forgive me, Lord.

I’m just flesh….and the Flesh is weak.


The gun falls from my hands as I see your eyes widening, your conscience coming back to you as you realize how close to death you were. I fall to the ground as I feel rough hands closing on me, pulling me, forcing me to kneel and to surrender myself to them. Then there is only darkness.

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I’m sitting here, in this lonely, damp prison cell.

The court against me has been issued faster than the light, accused of multiple homicide I left them speechless when I told them I was guilty. I am guilty of killing them and so I must pay the price as instituted by the Law of Man.

The death sentence arrived almost immediately and I accepted it in peace.

And now I’m here, few hours until the end but, I’m not sad, quite the contrary. A couple of cops, understanding what I had stopped, decided to fulfill my last wish. They delivered my first, and only, message to Her, after checking it and censoring it as they saw fit.

I didn’t say much, I wished her well, to recover, to return to be what she once was, what I had loved for so long, hoping for her forgiveness.

Some day.


I’m at peace with what awaits me and yet, I have a weight on my soul, a sadness that I do not comprehend.

Must be Her.

What I felt, and still feel, for Her.

A sound suddenly break the silence of these halls. Feets, almost running, frantic, as they move toward me. As I look out of the cell I see Her running toward me.

It can’t be.

She can’t be here for me.


And still it’s in front of my cell that You stop, looking at me from a face distorted from the corruption, I see that you are still prisoner of those substances but, as I watch your eyes, I see the spark of light that shows your determination to fight for yourself.

Your voice is still rough but, to my ears, there has never been a more melodious sound.


“You’re the one who killed Karl and the others, right?”

I don’t speak, I can’t remember how to speak as I watch you, still surprised of seeing you here for real. Still, I slowly nod.

“I’ve read your letter. From how long were you following me? Since when you…”


The words erupt from my lips without my control, I answer You truthfully as I give voice to my desire towards you for the first time in my life.

“Since I first saw you. Today it is three years, five months, four days and four hours since I started following you, since I stood guard over you. I’ve loved you as one can love the most beautiful and rare flower of the world. A work of art so perfect that cannot be touched but, only admired from afar, avoiding to consume it.”

I see fear in your eyes but, it doesn’t matter. I feel that weight on my soul slowly lifting away, as I’m now giving you the truth, even though I know I will be hated by you forever.

Even though I know I will lose any hope of being forgiven.

“Why have you intervened that night? You…You wanted to kill me, isn’t that right?”

“I’ve been watching you for a long time, admiring you from afar, only to see your fall. I’ve seen how you fell prey of the Corruptor, the one you call Karl.

I didn’t interfere before since you had need of your own happiness, even though I have hated you at the beginning. But then I realized that you needed a more physical love than what I could have given you. And so, as long as you were happy, it was enough for me… But then I watched helplessly at the betrayals, the humiliation, the punishments that you suffered for Him.

But you still smiled happily.

How could I have stopped your only source of happiness?

But then , you began to fall in the darkness. He corrupted you in your soul, forcing you to take the road to damnation, changing you in an impure copy of the Goddess you are.

I…I couldn’t see you in that state.

It had been impossible for me to stop myself.

That is why I came. That is why I killed.”


With a knot in my throat I then heard myself say those words that I wouldn’t want to pronounce but, you asked for the Truth…and I cannot disobey you.

“…Yes. I wanted to kill you.

A vengeance in your name for what you had let befall you, for having abandoned your being perfect in order of being able to sit beside the Corruptor.

But I couldn’t.

When I looked at you in that room , lost in your foggy dreams of chemicals and pills, I saw in you the Evil to be eradicated…But I also saw You, for what you were.

The radiant woman, my only love.

At that moment I realized I couldn’t hurt you.

I couldn’t.”

I see tears falling from Your eyes, as you slowly fall on your knees, away from the cell but with your stare always lost in my eyes. It is then, that you speak the words that I will bring with me after my death, those words that let me feel so alive to be not afraid of anything.

“Thanks…Thanks for saving me.”

You move closer to the cell, under the vigilant eye of the guards, as you take my hand in yours and you bring it on your cheek, keeping it there, holding it tightly as you cry.


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I am lying on this bed, cables and what’s not all around me, the serious scowls of the people around me, as they watch me angrily, surprised or even satisfied. Yes, some of them are happy that I’m going to die, the parents and the friends of the Corruptor. All of them are here to enjoy my last few breaths in this world. To enjoy my suffering, as minimum as it can be.

But it’s not the that have captured by stare.

It is only You.

Hiding near your parents, you openly cry as you watch me.

You’re crying for me?

The world begins to become obscure…my vision is foggy…a cold feeling…envelops…me.

The thoughts…are becoming…slow…

My…Only…Love…

Farewell….







[“Good Evening, Ladies and Gentlemen, I’m Suzanne Collins for GNN.

This morning was closed the Trial for the accusations of extortion, prostitution, kidnapping, drug trafficking, bribery, rape and crime association toward the late Brenner Karl and of his, now disbanded, gang of criminals.

The closure of these horrible crimes have to thanks the tenacity of the Police, which provided new proofs out of the crime scene, and to the perseverance and interest of Jenna Intregard, girlfriend and victim of the late Karl Brenner.

The new case showed to us all a side of this story that nobody could have believed, leading to the arrest of not only the gang members of Brenner, but also to his parents, his siblings and to some other members from their family tree.

Were, moreover, condoned the accusations against the Late William J. Burton, previously condemned to death for the same crimes that had been falsely alleged to his person.

Today we have shown you all a major problematic in our legislation system, where money, once again, has bought innocence for the guilty.

As was also commented by Miss Intregard: < The true criminals have been arrested. Justice has been finally done but, at what price? The man who saved my life has been killed by the same testimonies of those men who had been raping me and forced me to use drugs to keep me around as their personal prostitute.

Where is the Justice in this? >

This was Suzanne Collins, for GNN. Line to you, Studio.”]