...Then I Grew Up

I hate myself and I miss the person that I used to be. Ever since I could walk and talk, laugh and cry, I was quite a likable human being. I was your dearest darling who resided among the trees by day and velvet bed covers by night. I had been a cherubic toddler once in my life, stumbling upon my own two ample feet and smiling at the strangest of strangers. At five I had been known throughout my family as the golden haired and golden hearted fledgling of a flower child. As I grew to become a snappy scamp, galloping barefooted through the green, I acquired probably my most optimum skill yet, swimming. At eight I was just a little toe headed girl splashing through the water, getting her feet wet. As I grew however, it became my life. I would eat, I would swim, I would sleep, and then repeat. On the pool deck is where I became acquainted with my closest of friends. On the pool deck is where I accomplished my greatest of feats. On the pool deck is where I first found love. I was proud to be a part of the Jupiter Dragons Swim Team, and most importantly I was proud of myself. Until I turned twelve terrible years young. My life was flipped upside-down. My heart was torn inside-out. My mind was annihilated. My friendships became secondary, my blade took their place and all of a sudden I had lost the race. The race to happiness, love, and glory. The race that determines the rest of the story. So here I am now, fifteen years old. With thirty-one scars on my body and even more on my soul.