Selfies

Jessica hated to admit it, but she was a little bit nervous when she rang the doorbell. Just being on the porch was bringing back all kinds of memories of when she and her friend, Mary Starr, played there. But she hadn't been here in a long time and she hadn't spoken to Mary's mother in years.

When the door opened, Jessica saw that Mrs. Starr did not look well. She seemed older and grayer then she had before. She also did not appear very friendly. "Who are you?" she snapped.

"You know me, Mrs. Starr. I'm Jessica, Mary's friend."

"My God!" said Mrs. Starr. "What happened to your hair?"

"Oh. I got a buzz cut." Jessica loved her buzz cut. She thought it was cool, but sometimes she had to remind herself that she liked it even though nobody else did. "Can I come in?"

"Why would I want you in my house?"

"It's a strange story. Please."

Mrs. Starr shrugged and let her in.

Jessica remembered being in the house too, but now she saw that it was not as tidy as when she had last been there. Newspapers and empty boxes were scattered around the living room. There were also some empty bottles. This helped explain why the room smelled of liquor.

"Shit!" said Mrs. Starr. "I'm out of cigarettes."

"I might have a few." Jessica fumbled in her pocket and pulled out a carton with exactly two cigarettes left. Mrs. Starr took one tentatively.
'
"Does your mother know you're smoking?" Mrs. Starr asked. "How is your mother anyway? Does she like what you've done to yourself?" (Hell no, but Jessica didn't feel like discussing that.) Mrs. Starr snorted. "Raising a teenager. I guess I should be thankful I never had to go through that hell! But I still don't understand why you're here."

Jessica took a deep breath. "Something weird happened with my phone."

"Do I look like a repair person?"

"Well. . .no. Some photos appeared on my phone and I didn't take them. I have no idea how they got there."

"Strange." Mrs. Starr took a drag of her cigarette. "But I still don't understand what it has to do with me."

Jessica took a deep breath. "Let me show you the photos. Most of them are of these two girls. They look like selfies."

The first picture showed two girls who looked like teenagers. One had dark hair and a fairly tan complexion. The other was a blonde with long flowing hair. They were both smiling brightly for the camera and appeared to be hugging. "Ugh!" said Mrs. Starr. "What a couple of Barbies!"

"i know, right, but. . .well. . .take a look at this one." The two girls were also in the next photo, but they were wearing aprons and standing to either side of a smiling middle-aged woman who was also wearing an apron and smiling brightly. "It took me a while to place that woman, but she's you, isn't she?" '

"What?" Mrs. Starr grabbed the phone. She stared at it for a long moment. "You know, I think I sort of recognize where this photo's from."

Jessica got excited. "You do?"

"The background is that soup kitchen where I used to volunteer. The volunteers all wore aprons like that."

"So you do know these girls?"

"Slow down, kiddo. I only said that I sort of recognize it. I'm pretty sure we never had any volunteers who looked like that. Maybe this picture is photoshopped."

Well, that was disappointing. Jessica thought some more. "There is another reason I wanted to tell you about this, but it's even harder to explain in a way." She paused again. "Looking at these pictures, do you think the dark-haired girl looks a little familiar?"

"Not really."

"She looks to me a little bit like. . .Mary."

"That's ridiculous. She's much older than Mary was."

"I know, but there is a resemblance. She could be Mary's older sister or something."

"Mary didn't have an older sister," said Mrs. Starr coldly. She was silent for another minute. "Is this a prank?"

"What? No!"

"I bet one of your crazy Goth friends put you up to it. It wasn't enough that you caused the single worst day of my life. You have to go and make my life miserable this way too."

There is nothing worse then being accused of something you didn't do. "I didn't cause that day!"

"Before she met you, Mary knew not to play on railroad tracks."

Jessica felt tears forming in her eyes. "It was the single worst day of my life too," she said. "You know, I still remember how it started. I remember how happy I felt because school had let out for the summer and it was a gorgeous day, and I was all set to spend an entire day with my best friend at my favorite place.

"I also still remember the sound of the train. And I remember how the ground vibrated as the train approached.

"You know what else I remember? The mess. I'll bet you didn't get there after they'd cleaned up most of it, but I got to see the blood. The bits of dark hair. I think I even saw some bits and pieces of bone!"

Mrs. Starr seemed to soften a little bit. After a sigh, she said, "Well, even if that is Mary in the picture--and I still don't see how it could be--the next question is who is the other girl? Any ideas?"

Jessica shrugged. "Nobody comes to mind."

Mrs. Starr held the phone up next to Jessica's head.

"What are you doing?" asked Jessica.

"It's hard to say, because you don't have much hair, but what you do have is the right color. Also, the girl in the picture isn't wearing creepy eye-liner, but the face does have kind of the same shape--"

"No Way!" said Jessica suddenly understanding. "That makes no sense."

"The whole thing makes no sense," Mrs. Starr pointed out.

"Yeah. I think Mary probably sent me these photos."

"Mary, how could she--"

"I don't know, but--" Jessica started sobbing to the air. "Mary can you hear me? This not funny. I'm sorry that you didn't get to be a teenager and act like that Miss High School sweetheart in those photos, but don't expect me to be that person for you now. I'm a crazy Goth bitch and don't you forget it!"

Jessica sobbed some more. Mrs. Starr just watched her and smoked. Finally, she spoke. "Well, if you're really dedicated to the Goth thing, you might want to invest in some better eye-liner. The kind you use now is getting all smeared." Did she smirk a little? Jessica couldn't be sure. "Here," said Mrs. Starr handing Jessica a box of tissues. "Blow your nose, while you're at it."

Then Jessica felt Mrs. Starr put her arm around her and hug her. "You know," said Mrs. Starr. "I don't think Mary sent us those pictures to make us miserable."

"No?"

"Nah, For one thing it would be a waste of time. We're both already there."

Now, it was Jessica's turn to smile a little.

"I think she sent us those pictures to tell us something more important. You see, she has to be what she is now, but you and I, we still have choices."

"Choices?"

"Yes," Mrs. Starr looked at her cigarette for a few seconds. Then, she seemed to violently stub it out.

"Choices to be other things."

1,251 words