a memorial for my recently deceased uncle |
Dear Uncle George Thanks for the memories. I had so much wanted to see you when all went wrong. You one of the first persons that I had as priority to make contact with and then you fell and now I sit wondering what could have been from a typewriter a long way from where I had intended to go. So much can change in such a short period of time. I write this as remembrance. It was a few years ago that I thought for sure that I was headed to Massachusetts. My counsellor was very excited. I was going to do something that I wanted to do. I can recall the sense of relief I had that I was going to be with my dad's brother that had been there for my dad on many occasions. You were the go to place for dad when he had no idea what he would do next. This letter seems to be a case in point. I find myself stumbling over letters trying to do right by you, my dad and your family and I find myself wondering what that means. Only weeks before I was headed to Massachusetts, I found that it was not easy to do what you want to do for yourself. Our home sold early and that meant people were wanting to move in. I was faced with an awful decision to make. My wife was not wanting to Massachusetts. There was nothing for her there. I pondered how she was having trouble with depression and memory issues and thought back to how this was not going to get better in another place. What would Uncle George do? It was kind of like needing to be there for my dad like you were there for my dad. I could not abandon Sharon as much as I longed to be with family in Massachusetts, no matter how unfair that seemed to me. I recalled the visit I had with you, which seems like an eternity away. You talked about the relationship you had with your own dad. You used to work in the same place. You both had the same name. In the course of going to work you find out that he is not there and later on you find out he is dead. I will never forget the look in your eyes, a sense of being lost. He died from diabetes. You decided that you would use that relationship to share with others the love of a father. I have tried in that same spirit to be there for my wife, knowing that my own kids are far away in the land of Kansas City. Divorce sucks. I find myself wondering if the love is still there. I can only trust in the what is going on in my heart and trust that they can look forward to seeing me as much as I look forward to seeing them. I pray that people do not forget who you are I know I do not even if I did not have the last visit. You fell and there were several surgeries, the days after the fall and then you were gone. I would not see you again and it feels awful, especially knowing you often said that I looked just like your father. I recall the times you came to cut our hair with a bowl as a template, you were there to help fix a basement into a place that would become my bedroom. You were the person who was always trying to salvage things from the dump that no one wanted. Often enough I stayed at your place as I waited for events like births and my sisters wedding. I love you Uncle George. I can not forget. I have no doubt that your father lived in you and in another sense your spirit lives in me. Thank you for being there to love and being willing to redeem. To many you will be remembered as the bicycle man, because you took bikes that were broken and for a small price fixed them for kids that needed a bike to ride. Thank you for being there for family, thank you for ways that you were there for me. I love you Uncle George and I hope in my own way that I can be there for others in remembrance of the wonderful life you shared. I love you Uncle George. I pray the same love that brought us together brings us back together again. Love your nephew Gary |