My Freedom Of Femininity

I guess I was just willing to do something different. I guess I was tired of being tired. I guess maybe sometimes things effect a girl differently than it does for others.

I used to work in a store. What I did means little now. All I know is that I was always tired. My life was going nowhere. Then Tom came into my life.

I would go to work. Like everyone else, I was the good employee; the good girl who did what she was told and did the work of the slackers. I worked my tail off only to come home and do laundry, clean house and try to make a decent meal before falling into bed dead tired.

I was equal. I was my own woman. Nobody could tell me what to do. Nobody, that is, but the time clock, the boss, the bill collectors and society I blindly followed.

One Saturday I went to visit my friend Cindy. She was one of those girly girl types who believed women should be housewives. We sat and talked for a while.

I didn't know it but Cindy invited this guy over to meet me. She told me at the last minute because she knew I would back out. I hated the type of guys she knew. They were the old fashioned type who controlled their women.

Tom came in. He wasn't a super huge he man type of guy. Just a rugged old fashioned looking guy who dressed a little differently than most.

I noticed he had a masculinity that didn't seem like that of other guys. He just seemed sure of himself and set in what he wanted in life.

At first I felt nervous. Those feelings soon left as Tom joked around and we all teased one another. He didn't seem to be some holier than thou religious guy. Just an old fashioned man who was before his time, I guess you would say.

The control of Tom's voice captivated me. I found myself giving in. I felt as though I might be able to enjoy being around a man my mother said were sexist pigs.

It didn't take long and Tom wanted to take me out. I found myself giving in. We made plans for a weekend when I was off.

I raced around that week cleaning my place so it wouldn't be a mess when he showed up. What was happening to me?

That night there was a knock on the door and I couldn't wait to open it.

Tom took me to a restaurant. He opened doors and even helped slide my chair in when we were seated.

I always make it a point to order for myself. This time I just sat there quiet as Tom ordered our meal. There was just something different about this old fashioned guy I was falling in love with.

That night we made plans and ended up dating for a few months. It was always a joy to be with him. He gradually increased is control over me. I saw it, but loved it. The only thing I hated was being so tired.

Finally, one night, Tom opened a box and took out a ring. What he said next floored me. Normally I would have got up and left. I just couldn't.

"You'll marry me and I will be your master. You'll live for me and I for you."

All I could do is shake my head yes.

"You'll be a wife and the mother of our children. You'll cook and clean and I'll set your rules and punish you when you are bad.
I'll supply your every need and love you until I die."

I just sat there dumbfounded. I didn't know what to say. I should be screaming "I'm an adult woman." I should be getting up to leave.

"If you agree to be kept, controlled, supplied for and disciplined say "Yes master."

If you disagree say the word and I'll leave."

My emotions were going back and forth. The man I wanted, wanted me.

I wanted to be equal. I wanted to be in charge of my life. I wanted to command my destiny.

If I said yes master those huge calloused hands would not only hold me and cherish me, but spank me and control me. If I said yes my equality was gone. I would be his girl. I would be his possession.

I held out my hand.

He gently slid the ring on my finger as I smiled.

"Yes, master; your wish is my command, my lord."