Writing about writing

I’m really digging into work these days, going on strong with my new project, which I have already named “The Unwanted Hero”. I have a strange way of working, more often than not I’ll conjure up some title I like, and just work from that. This time isn’t much different, I had four words (“bio mechanical body modifications”, if you must know) written in my notebook, then this title popped up, and now I’m off working hard at notes. It feels so incredibly good to be back at working on some serious shit again, much better than just writing fanfics. As fun as that is, it’s much more rewarding coming up with something of my own, in a more serious way.

But yeah, this time I started out with those four words and the title, then sorta just went nuts with it. I made a long “What If” document, then another for other questions, then one more for answers, one for character ideas, one for antagonist(s), one for quotes, and aaaargh! That’s a LOT of documents, and I’ve only been at it for five days!

I love this though, I looooove planning! Coming up with the ideas is half the fun of writing for me, obviously I love putting words on paper and stringing them together in a way that makes sense, but coming up with what those words should be about holds a very special place in my heart. Maybe all planners feel that way? I dunno, I just love note taking, and figuring shit out.

I’m knee-deep in those K.M. Weiland activity books, and I truly love them. So far I’ve only dug into the one called “Outlining Your Novel”, but I have just cracked open the one about character arcs, to see what it has to offer at this point. I did so because I have literally no idea what my main character wants. Seriously, no idea, but I’ll figure that shit out soon! I also wanna throw a lot of attention towards two other characters, and I seriously can’t wait for this shit to go down! I’m so glad I spend my vacation reading through those books, they are quite glorious, and really boost my morale.

Besides this I take some time every day to read a book of my favorite author, C. Robert Cargill. It’s the sequel to his book “Dreams and Shadows”, and I seriously can’t recommend that guy enough. As an added bonus the book is written in 3rd person past tense, which is how I want to write my book. The last one was 1st person present tense, and as much as I love writing that way, this book demands something different. I have to get into the mindset though, the words doesn’t flow quite as freely (yet) as I want them to, but that just gives me another good excuse to read Cargill (and probably some other books written like that too).

I think it’s good for me to take a few hours each night to just read, I think I need that. It’s stress relief of the very best kind. Well that, and sex obviously. But as my sex life is non existent, I’ll have to settle for books.

Now I’m gonna go back to my heated blanket, cuddle up with book and cats, and then I’m off to bed in an hour or two. Still doing that whole odd sleep rhythm thing, and as I managed to get up at 3:30 this night, I better keep it going.

Since I have an operation coming up in January, I have to be up way before the crack of dawn. As in: I have to be up at 3:30 in the middle of the night, and it is horrible! Then again, this operation is (obviously) very important to me, and thus I’ll just have to push through it, but seriously, at 3:30, I hate everything. Everything besides coffee that is, but you know… I always love my coffee. It feels odd that all of a sudden 6pm is the appropriate time to go to bed, and if I’m still up at 8, it qualifies as having trouble sleeping. It’s 5:30 now, and my entire system is going, “What the fuck are you doing at this unholy hour?!” So are the kitties, by the way, they usually sleep when I sleep, making them just as confused as I am.

My vacation is finally over, and I have therefore begun a brand new project! I’m super excited about it, just the fact that I’m back to work feels amazing! All of yesterday was spend playing the “what if” game, and some of the ideas are super weird, others might actually pan out to be something. I successfully got through all of K.M. Weiland’s textbooks, and I am now going methodically through the ones with exercises. If you’re just half as crazy about planning as I am, I highly recommend them, in fact, I recommend them to everybody.

Besides reading (a lot), I also got through my little fanfic project. I write those as sort of a palette cleanser, and I always go for pure fluff and happiness, contrasting my big, almost always depressing novels. With only 8 chapters and 22.000 something odd words, it was really easy to get done during the 14 days of vacation, and it picked me up from my post-NaNo depression. I posted it right here: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LivLeves, in case anyone feels like reading some gayness between Craig and Tweek from South Park.

I think I spend my vacation the best way I possible could. It was nice, I had fun, I completely reset my brain, and I even got a few random notes written down, some stuff that might just pan out to something big. I should really thank my best friend for dictating this vacation, she’s the best!

Now it’s time for me to go back to work, make up some more “what ifs” and some more character traits. See ya!

Okay, so I’ve really been wavering back and forth on what to do about “We Dream About Surviving”. At first I posted the whole damned thing at once, and all of it as if it was a print book. You know, with no extra spaces between fragments, with indents at dialogue, all that kind of things. But my impression of this site, is that – just like archive of our own – people would much rather read it WITH those things, than without them. And I must admit, that I do enjoy reading things on screens that way too, because it just feels easier. It’s the same amount of words, it just breaks it up a little, into smaller more easily managed pieces.

So I took down “We Dream About Surviving”, to think this through, and my conclusion is that it should go back up again, only revised in a way that fits the purpose. I just want people to read it, after all, I’m happy with the book and I feel like it deserves to be read. So I’m gonna do that, I’m gonna break it into a million little pieces, and post it all over again, for you to read.

The downside to this is I won’t be posting it just yet, and I certainly won’t be posting it all at once. I’ll most likely do a chapter a week, so that I can also give it a proper read-through as I go. It didn’t get much editing attention before I posted it the first time, because I was just so damned excited that it was done. But as all books, regardless of genre and level of talent, it deserves to be edited and revised. Which will definitely take some time too, and I’m not sure when I’ll be up for the task. I might do it before doing anything else, but I can’t make any promises.

Regardless of all this, I’m doing pretty well actually. I’ve buried myself in books on writing and taken a few weeks off for just reading and learning. I’ve got another four hundred (!!!) pages to go before I’m doing any kind of serious note-taking, although I have jotted down a few ideas here and there, in my miniature notebook. I don’t give them much thought though, it’s just random snippets, like, “here’s a piece of dialogue that sounds kinda good” or, “here’s some lyrics from a song you might wanna use for something” or even just, “here’s a name you like”.

Whatever it turns out to be, it’ll definitely be within the speculative genre, most likely science fiction as another grand backdrop for some excessively long and probably depressing love story. I wouldn’t be surprised if that was the case, at least.

Now I’m gonna return to my studies, maybe write a little more fanfic (you can find me right: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LivLeves), maybe actually take a gander at that book. I dunno. I’ll do something.

I’m slowly starting to feel better about NaNo being over. Digging into books like “Sandman Slim” and “Outlining Your Novel” isn’t the worst thing ever. Granted, the latter wouldn’t please my best friend, due to the fact that it might be a little too close to working, but whatever. It keeps me afloat, makes me feel like I’m doing something meaningful, in spite of doing nothing at all. “Sandman Slim” is a great novel by the way, go read it! And if you're a planner like me, “Outlining Your Novel” seems like a must-have book, so grab that too!

Besides that, I’m finding my way back to slightly healthier routines, like doing my dishes and eating properly. When you’re writing 10-12 hours a day, there isn’t time for much else, and it’s quite nice to see my apartment not looking like shit. I spend four hours (!!!) cleaning yesterday, and now I can actually see my desk and kitchen counter! All of my clothes are clean too, seriously, it feels like magic.

I’ve successfully quit smoking again, and it’s not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. If anything it happened out of sheer laziness, I just couldn’t be bothered to go fetch cigarettes, so instead I just quit. It happened Sunday, and I have yet to murder someone, which I believe to be a success in itself. I guess it really just was a stress-thing, it’s my go-to when I feel pressured, and now that it’s over, I can handle the lack of cigarettes again.

I’m having a hard time painting though, it’s like I’ve forgot how to do it. It’s okay, maybe it’ll come back to me at some point, I can always pull out the tablet, and it’s not like I’m in any kind of rush to do it. Right now I take so much pleasure in reading, that I feel like I need nothing else anyway. With a library of 1000+ books, I’m pretty confident I can keep myself occupied through this week of vacation.

I took down the post it notes, and survived. I went and bought a nice box for them, and now they’re kept safely within. I also threw down the ones for “Swaying Between Worlds”, as I want to redo the whole thing, I figured I would get rid of those as well. It didn’t feel nearly as bad to get rid of those, than it did “We Dream About Surviving”, so I think it’s a safe bet not to keep them around. If I don’t feel utterly depressed and heartbroken about letting go of a project, it probably wasn’t that great to begin with. It’s okay, I’ll come up with something better, I just know it.

Now, I’m going to go get dressed and go for a walk. I could definitely go for some fresh air, and the weather is real nice here in Denmark today, with a clear blue sky and everything!

I must admit I’m a little bummed out that NaNo is over. It’s an odd empty feeling, not knowing what I’m supposed to do when I get up, and I’m struggling hard to try and keep to the vacation plan. I feel oddly lonely, something I don’t usually do. I’m great at being by myself, I don’t lack human contact in general, it’s just… When I’m not working, I don’t know what I’m supposed to do with myself. Working so insanely much through November, I guess I forgot what it’s like to just do nothing at all. I have all these options surrounding me; painting, reading, playing video games, watching movies; but nothing feels right. Instead I find myself just sitting around and listening to depressing music, feeling sorry for myself, that November is all gone and my book is finished.

Speaking off, the book has been posted here on writing.com, so if you’re in the mood for sex, violence and most importantly romance, go check it out.

I have to take all my post its for my NaNo book down from the bulletin board, to make way for new ones, and it feels hard to do so. I’m keeping them – obviously – but taking them down means it really is over and done with. That little project that grew so much, my “We Dream About Surviving”, the best thing I’ve ever had the pleasure of writing. I know it makes room for new discoveries and new things to spend my time doing, but… I don’t know, it’s still a lot to take in.

I’m trying to quit smoking again, there’s only a month and a half till my surgery, I should really try and focus on that. Smoking through November was a horribly bad decision, but at least I’m giving the non-smoking life another go. Some day I might just succeed, who knows, I don’t care all that much about it right now. It’s just one of those things I have to do, I guess.

Fuck this sucks! It fucking sucks that NaNo’s over, it fucking sucks that I can’t just slip down in front of the computer and know exactly what I’m supposed to do, it fucking sucks that I feel so lonely, it fucking sucks that I have to let this go. I guess I wasn’t quite ready for it to end, and that fucking sucks.

Now, I’m going to take those post its down, I have to do it sooner or later, might as well go and rip that bandage off. Afterwards? I don’t know. I’ll figure it out when I get there.

Go read the book, instead of this depressing blog. Seriously, it can only be better than this.

That’s it! With a whole day to spare, I managed to finish my NaNo book! I seriously couldn’t feel better about myself right now, not only did I manage the starting 50.000 words goal, I managed to do all 26 chapters, reaching a whopping 133.558 words in total! Now I’m going to read through the whole damned thing, add and deduct where needed be, and then I’m declaring it done. This means I will be posting it here soon enough, and this time I’m just going to upload the whole damned piece at the same time.

I feel kind of confident about it, for the first time ever, I actually feel like I’ve written something genuinely good. It might be delusions of sleep deprivation and caffeine poisoning speaking, but seriously, I think I did well. I cried a lot, but I also managed to do just what I wanted to do, and the ending turned out better than I expected. I’m happy, I’m so fucking happy right now, even if I am terribly tired, over worked and looking forward to my vacation.

I’m listening to Andy Black, Kuba Oms, Marianas Trench and many more; smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol free apple wine. Soon enough I’ll get to that reading, but right now, I just want to sit back and do this for a little while. I have done nothing but write for the past month, I think I deserve a moment to just sit and feel good about myself.

At the same time, I feel a little sad that the project is over. Some things you just don’t want to end, and this is definitely one of them, I could have written about these characters for all eternity and without ever growing sick of them. Oh Michael Mayhem, you really went and did a number on me.

Speaking of, I changed the title in the very last minute! I have this old tattoo (well actually it’s part of a much bigger tattoo), that says, “We dream about surviving”. And trust me, nothing could fit this book any better than those words, so that’s what I ended up naming it, instead of “Murder Michael Mayhem”. After I switched a chapter around (which made me have to rewrite the whole damned thing, but that’s another story entirely), it didn’t quite fit anymore. “We dream about surviving” does, in fact, I couldn’t come up with anything more appropriate for those words. I always thought I was going to make that into a book some day, and there it is, all done and in a month none the less.

It still feels bittersweet, but you know… All good things come to an end, and this one… Well, this one was definitely good. I’ve learned a lot through writing this, the main one being: Don’t ever write that many words a day ever again. Or well, at least not until next November. I also learned that writing a first-person narrative is what I should do, it really works well for me. Sure, it limits some things, but I really love writing that way. Present tense is definitely a go to too, it gives me something I’ve never had before, as I’ve only ever written in third-person past tense before. Odd how I switched that completely around, but I learn well from trial and error.

Now for my vacation, I simply can’t wait! Me and my best friend have tons of plans, watching all kinds of Christmas shit, playing video games, drawing, painting, you name it we got it! I think it was yesterday when I realized that one of the many inspirations to my NaNo book was a painting I did, so yeah, definitely going to do more of that! I’ve got these huge wooden boards lying around, taking up half my living room really, and I’m going to cover them in digital artwork, just painting till I drop!

Speaking of best friend, she just texted me, and now I’m going to go hang out with her, and celebrate my huge victory!

It’s borderline insane, but I would literally rather do my dishes than write the ending of my NaNo novel. In fact I am, right now there’s a bunch of dishes soaking in the sink, and writing this blog post is just another method of procrastination. I’m listening to new music, I’m lying in bed, I’m watching Adventure Time, anything really, to push the ending away. Now I have written a lot of depressive shit in my day, but nothing quite as bad as this. I fell in love with my characters, but unfortunately, things doesn’t work out well for them. I try not to think too much about it, but once in a while, I’ll just sit staring blankly off into space, and it’s the only thing I can think about. I’m a sensitive guy, you know, I cry about a lot of fictional shit. Yet have I to manage sitting through the entire “The Fountain” without crying. It’s a movie, look it up if you want to have a seriously bad day.

I’ve discovered that writing – to me – is really just a creative way of self-torture. I manage to make myself depressed every single time I work on something big, every single fucking time, I manage to go all in on the sad stuff. This one is particularly bad, I really wish I didn’t have to write this ending, if anything, I’ve tried wrapping it into something happy quite a few times, without any kind of success. If something starts bad, it ends bad, that’s just the way it works with classic tragedies. Why oh why can’t I just write fucking comedy for once? Well, not this time at least, I hate it, but it has to end badly.

Once in a while I wish I hadn’t used this for NaNo. It’s long, I’ve already passed 120.000 words, I could have stretched it across at least three or four months if it hadn’t been for my NaNo obsession. Then again, it’s like a band aid. You can hope it falls off on its own, but in the end you’re going to have to pull at the damned thing, and the longer you wait, the more it just hurts like a motherfucker. Might as well do what you set out to do, and get rid of it in a month.

Except for NaNo and my many, very deliberate ways of not finishing, nothing is really going on in my life. There’s NaNo, and that’s about it. I have little to no social life, I survive on coffee and cigarettes, I stay indoors because I can’t stand being around other people, and I feel like crying all the time. Fucking depressing really. I doubt I’ll leave the apartment before December 1st, at its earliest. I just can’t fucking deal.

I would put in an anecdote about a guy I’ve had a crush on for the past eight or nine years, who might just come and visit me soon, when for once, both of us are single. Then again, that might actually go and make this blog post just the slightest bit of uplifting, and that certainly ain’t what I’m aiming for here. So fuck off, I’m just gonna go sob over the dishes.

We are now halfway through November, and I’m still pushing persistently forward through NaNo. I’ve reached 78.000+ and I haven’t even updated my word count of the day. It’s hard, but I’m a stubborn little bugger, and I strive to keep my average at around 5K. So far I’ve had one slip-up day, where I only wrote about 3.500, but yesterday I fought a hard battle to get it back up there. I’m a little proud of myself, actually, and I’m starting to believe that I’ll make it on time, and getting through November without dying and/or killing someone who isn’t fictional.

Killing off fictional characters is a dream come through though. Never in my entire life have I written something as violent as “Murder Michael Mayhem”, it’s insane. Once in a while I have to stop, think about how fucked up I am, and then continue with another murder. The massive amounts of sex-scenes just adds to it, I know for certain that this book belongs in the Extreme Graphic Content category.

Back when I wrote my first sex scene, about a year ago, I thought I’d die from embarrassment, and spend half the time just walking in circles (literally, I got up off the chair, and paced around the living room). I’ve gotten better though, not just in regards to content, but also handling it. Yes, it will take everything out of me to post it online, but then again, I like those scenes and I think they fit in quite nicely where I placed them. So far I’ve got maybe four or five sex scenes throughout the book, and my bet is there will be more. Not sure though, but it seems a little unlikely that I won’t cram in more.

As some may have noticed, I have removed “Swaying Between Worlds”. While I’ve been writing “Murder Michael Mayhem”, I’ve caught on to maybe 8.000.000 flaws and mistakes in “Swaying Between Worlds”, and as such, I’m going to rewrite the whole damned thing. I still think the basic idea is good, I just made too many fuck ups, for me to keep posting it in its current state. I’ve made myself a wanna be schedule, that has no dates or deadlines, just things I want to do, and what order I want to do them in.

• First I’m going to get through November, and hopefully, finish “Murder Michael Mayhem” on time.
• Second I’m going to take a well-deserved vacation, hopefully I’ll be able to relax for a week, not glancing at anything writing-related.
• Third I’m considering trying to write a story for one of the many sci-fi magazines out there. Not entirely sure about that one yet though, but I might.
• Fourth I’m going to throw all my energy into making new notes and basically rebuild everything that has to do with “Swaying Between Worlds”.
• And then finally, I’ll begin the actual writing of “Swaying Between Worlds”, all over again.

I’m looking forward to all of that, as stressful as it is to do this NaNo thing, I truly love writing the book, and I hope I get to finish it on time. Writing a short story, something I hardly ever do, sounds like a lot of fun, a challenge in its own. Diving back into “Swaying Between Worlds”, even if it does mean redoing the whole damned thing, sounds like yet another dream come true. And I guess the whole vacation concept won’t be too bad either. I think I’ll need it, if anything, I think I’ll just sleep through most of it.

But for now, all my focus goes to “Murder Michael Mayhem”. I’m closing in on the depressing part, which is killing me softly, but that’s just the way it’s got to be. Not everything can be kittens and candy, sometimes shit just goes down, and everything fucks up.

I think that’s all for now, I better go get dressed now, and go for my usual midday walk.

I guess it really is time to give an update on the whole NaNo experience, something I probably should have done days ago, but I simply haven’t had the time to do. Why no time? Well because of NaNo of course! I am a horrible overachiever, and as such, I have set myself some highly unrealistic goals, that will surely be the end of me. Never the less, here I am, trying to fit in a little blog post right in the middle of dying due to stress.

When I started planning, it came out no less than 26 chapters. Therefore I obviously set myself the goal of doing a chapter a day, giving me little wiggle-room near the end, and still be done with the entire novel on time. Now in the last book I wrote, the chapters were roughly 4000-4500 words long. With “Murder Michael Mayhem”? Not so much. If anything they are scoring around 5500-6000(!!!) words per chapter, which is a fuck load to do every single day. Trust me when I say, I’m going to need that wiggle-room. Apparently bloody murder, gay sex scenes, plot and character development takes up a fucking lot of words! Who would have thought?!

Now if I keep this up, the book will come out way above 100.000 words. That is… A lot. What I thought would be this nice little side-project, grew into an outright monster, but I love it! I love this story so fucking much, it breaks my heart from time to time (and that’ll only get worse), but I really think it’s worth the trouble. It’s only November 9th, and already I’m closing in on 50.000 words. In fact, with the rate I’m going, I’ll get there tomorrow. In 9 days I have written exactly 44.763 words. Wow. I cannot believe it.

On the other hand, I have no school, no job, and close to no social life. My brain turns to mush at least once a day, where I have to force myself away from the computer, go for a walk and get some fresh air. And when I get back? Well I sit down and I write some more. Of course I do. I’m obsessed with reaching this insane goal, and I really think I can do it. Sometimes I simply stop understanding words, like it’s complete gibberish, and I might as well be trying to write a novel in Russian. It’s almost surreal, this is by far the hardest task I have ever taken upon myself, but fuck I love it! If nothing gets in my way, I’ll definitely be doing NaNo again next year, and the year after that, and you probably get where I’m going with this.

My advice to anyone wishing to do NaNo though? Well, don’t do what I do. What I do is borderline insane, and cannot be recommended to anyone. I survive off caffeine and nicotine, I sleep as little as I can get away with, and I barely leave the apartment. It’s not a healthy way of doing anything, so if you should ever do NaNo, don’t do it like this. Seriously. It might turn out incredibly rewarding to me, to have written an entire (really long) novel in 30 days, but still… It’s really not very healthy.

Now though, it’s past my bedtime. At least if I want to catch just a little amount of sleep, before getting up early, and repeat the entire process. Work, work, fuck damn it, I love my work!

Grit your teeth, pull your hair,
Paint the walls black and scream, "Fuck the world”
         Missing You, All Time Low

It is the last day before NaNo begins, and I am beyond terrified. I think I have prepped in any way possible, but I still feel like a nervous wreck, wondering if I can make it through the month at all. I can see myself dying from caffeine poisoning or stress, just from looking at the schedule, who knows how hard it’s going to get once it actually begins? Then again, if I can make it through this, I’m pretty sure I can conquer the world, so that’s something.

So what exactly have I been doing to prep? Let’s have a look into my deranged notes and the way I make shit happen.

First off, I go open my drawer of random post it notes. These post its are filled with strange snippets, anything from sentences, quotes, random words, prompts, song lyrics, names, character traits, anything really. I go through them methodically, pick some out that seem to fit together, or might turn into something useful. Half of them is probably crap, but whatever I don’t end up using, goes straight back in the drawer. You never know, it might not be so crappy 30 years from now, or it might somewhere down the line, lead to something none-shitty. Either way it doesn’t take up all that much space, so it might as well go back to where it came from.

Then I ponder. And I can ponder a lot, just so you know. Usually I just flop down on my couch, lie there and stare up at the ceiling, glancing at the notes once in a while until I come up with something. I might not be able to stay in this “lying on the couch” state for all that long, sometimes I will have to remove myself to do other things, but that’s okay, I have notebooks and/or post its everywhere. This time, with “Murder Michael Mayhem”, I remember coming up with the title, sitting in a bus with one of my closest friends. Once I had that down, the brainstorming began.

The first thing I do when I brainstorm, is make a new document and do the whole “What If” kind of thing. In another document, I keep questions, like for instance: “Who wants to murder Michael?” and “Why do they want to murder him?”. These two documents combined, gives me a fuck-load of ideas, some remarkably better than others, but still, they are all there. I try to answer all the questions I have for myself, with “What if’s”, then jot down more questions, back and forth. I ended up with maybe 8 pages of what if’s, this time around, and there might just be some other stories hidden in there somewhere.

Now I’ve more or less got the basic idea for the story, and thus, it is time for more documents. I do everything in LibraOffice documents, partly because it’s free, partly because it’s easy. All I really need is words and an index feature, then I’m good to go. Anyways, I start at the very beginning, figuring out the narrative, the shape, what type of story it is, core word and stuff like that. If anyone wants to know more about core word(s), I highly recommend spending some time in the company of Scarlett Thomas and her book “Monkey’s with Typewriters”. Either that, or wait for me to get back to it at some point, because I most likely will.

I think this time around, I did the universe description next, because I wanted to do this whole cyberpunk/science fiction/high tech thing, I needed to get that down first. I had a pretty good idea of the story and characters, mind you, I needed to focus on where to put them. Since I was digging into the sci-fi genre, I decided to do a “scientific discoveries” document separately, just to make the world description less crowded.

Now in this science fiction universe, there is another race, different from humans yet not entirely so. These got their own document too, where I wrote down what they look like, what they can do, what they can’t do, how they work in general. Most importantly, I wrote down what they are, how they fit into the world, where they came from, that kind of thing. There’s a really big difference between what I did, and the average alien from outer space, but even if you’re doing that type of thing, you need to know where they came from, how they got there, and why!

Then there’s some very specific notes that only applies for this particular novel: I needed creative ways to commit murder, weapons to do it with, and how to get away with it, time and time again. So this got another document, and I spend almost an entire day getting this down. You get super weird when you write shit like that, by the way, and your search history will never be the same again.

Then came the character descriptions, and I have a quite long survey ready to do those, both for major and minor characters. This time around I only have two major characters, but it still took several days to get them all filled out and edited into something that made perfect sense.

Finally I’m ready to do the actual story line! I tried typing it out, and then I tried again, and again… And finally, I came to terms with the fact that I needed scene cards. I stumbled across this technique somewhere on the internet, and it’s actually really smart. You write down all the scenes you want, starting off with a title (that you can obviously change later on). Then you add a list of characters, that needs to be there, then a content note (what’s going to happen), and finally the grand question: WHY! The why is by far the most important part, because this is where you have to prove to yourself (and by extension your readers) why this scene is important. For instance it can be important character development, moving forth the plot, introducing a new character, tension building, that type of thing. Point is: it needs to be important. If you can remove the scene without it having any effect, you might as well do just that. I think I did a pretty decent job with “Murder Michael Mayhem”, I don’t think there’s any fluff-fillers for no apparent reason at least.

Once I had all my scenes down, all the stuff I simply could not live without including, I began shuffling them around, trying to find the best possible way for the story to fit together. It took a while, and the scene cards really helped, because sooner or later I got it. It came down to 26 chapters, which means I’ll more or less have to write a chapter a day, for me to get it done in November. But that’s okay, worst thing that can happen is that I fail horribly, and die as a result of it, because I am a extremely self-hating overachiever.

Then I basically just typed the scene cards back into the computer, re-read the whole notes document, added a few things, deleted some others, and that’s about it. That’s how I planned it out, and I just finished reading through the entire notes document this morning. I began October 4th, so nearly a month on planning alone. Then again, this will make my actual writing go a lot more smoothly, I don’t have to come up with something halfway at the finish line, I know how it starts, I know how it ends, and I know all the shit that goes in between.

Now I’m going to go read a fanfic, eat some cake, and continue stressing out about tomorrow.