Prologue

Hugh was the picture of innocence. He was the child every parent wanted. It was an endless stream of questions that parent's never quite know how to answer. He was on his way to becoming that photo you kept next to your bed when he moved out and was busy minding smaller versions of himself in a nicely furnished townhouse with a well-rounded, caring partner.
Unfortunately, the past tense is ever so present.
Hugh Barkridge. Son of Prysm and Zaros Barkridge. Cursed. Murderer. Lost beyond hope. That's what he was now, a huge disappointment.

Hugh always loved the forest behind the Barkridge Mansion. They weren't exactly homely, but they were welcoming and friendly, even if some of the bushes liked to bite at his knees and face. The forest liked to play with Hugh just as much as Hugh liked to play with the forest. He could be whoever or whatever he wanted; a stiff army commander one moment and acrobatic Tarzan of the apes the next. A sneaky fox, hatching a plan to get at the neighbour's chickens, a young crow learning to fly for the first time or even an abandoned buck, eager to make the jump to adulthood on its own. Of course, Hugh was very good at acting, and always managed to grab a few chickens before the farmer started shooting at him or make the treacherous leap out of the nest. Hugh was especially good at jumping out of the nest. Flying was his specialty. Hugh loved flying so much that he felt it was only fair to show his brother Alec how to fly as well. Alec loved listening to Hugh's stories of adventure and perilous journeys into the unknown, it was only fair, thought Hugh, that Alec come on his journeys too, and to do that he needed to learn how to fly.

Alec was only eight years old, which wasn't saying much because so was Hugh. He'd only lost his front two teeth and only ever spelled 'truth' correctly three times.

Hugh remembered the day he took Alec into the forest with him. He remembered because Alec made too much noise when they crawled out the basement window and he didn't run into the bushes fast enough when they thought that Ma and Da might have seen them. Hugh remembered feeling angry at Alec because he didn't understand how important it was to keep the forest adventures a secret. It was a perfect day, as it always is when fateful events take place. The sun made dappled patterns through the tall tree's leaves and made the air feel warm and friendly like it always should when adventurers return home safely. Hugh had guided Alec in between the trees until the castle was lost behind them. He pointed out badger holes and owl hollows, he informed Alec that, although they were sleepy and sometimes grumpy, owls really made the best hot chocolate and always had enough to share.

When Hugh and Alec reached the massive tree that had at least three different hollows, Hugh showed Alec the best hand-holds and branches to get to the top of the tree. Once they finally got to the top most hollow, Hugh introduced Alec to the eagles that lived there. At this point Hugh had difficulty communicating with Alec, but after he demonstrated how to jump off the branch and flap his wings in a certain way to keep yourself in the air Alec soon understood. He edged his way out onto the branch. He kept looking down at the forest floor and back up to Hugh, he made funny sounds with his oddly shaped mouth, but Hugh kept encouraging him on from the air. When Alec finally jumped, Hugh and the two eagles exchanged triumphant glances, but when they turned their attention back to Alec, he was still falling and he was making horrific noises with his mouth. Suddenly Hugh realised that not everyone could fly like an eagle or dig like a mole, Hugh realised that he had made a very terrible mistake and that he might not be able to fix it. The truth hit like a ton of bricks, Alec was falling and there was nothing Hugh could do to stop it.

Hugh might not have been very old, but he knew what happened when baby birds didn't learn how to fly before they hit the ground.
It was all happening in slow motion. Alec was falling. His arms were flailing and his eyes were hysteric. Hugh folded his wings in to dive after his brother but they didn't move fast enough. Hugh dived towards the ground and towards his human-shaped brother. It wasn't fast enough. Nothing could have been fast enough. The moment Alec landed was worse than being hit by a ton of bricks, it was like the ton of bricks had been hurtling towards Hugh faster than Hugh had been hurtling towards the ground.
The crunch was the worst.
The solidarity of it.
There was no pretending it hadn't happened. The sudden silence was painful to listen to. Hugh crashed onto the ground next to Alec- or what had been Alec. Hugh had arms instead of wings again and he scrambled along the grass to gather Alec's broken body in his arms. Things like this weren't supposed to happen to eight year olds playing in a forest on a sunny summer day. It wasn't supposed to happen, full stop. Hot tears were burning tracks down Hugh's face and for some reason he couldn't remember how to breathe. This was his fault. This was all his fault.

Hugh held Alec until there was no more water to cry with. He held Alec until he couldn't remember why he was there. That was a lie, he knew why he was there, but he didn't want to.
Someone cleared their throat behind him. The sound was so different to the sobs that had racked Hugh for however long he had been kneeling there that he started and turned to look behind him to where the voice had come from. There was nothing there. He looked again; still nothing.
"Hello?" Hugh's voice was dry and barely audible, but it sounded like a shout in the silent forest.
"I can make this better. I can make all of this disappear." The voice came from everywhere and nowhere. Hugh knew he had a wild imagination, but he also knew that he didn't usually hear things that came from nowhere.
"No you can't," He muttered, "Things like this don't just get better."
"Oh but they do, Mr Barkridge. I can make this better. Is that what you want?"
Hugh nodded. Of course it was what he wanted, there wasn't much that was worse than killing your brother. "I would do anything to make this day go away."
"Anything? Promising anything to a stranger is a bad idea Mr Barkridge, I'll give you some advice; never promise anything to anyone ever again."
"I don't care." Said Hugh, forgetting how to breathe again. "Make it better. Make him better. Take anything you want from me."
There was a sound that resembled a sigh, but could have been the trees rustling in the wind. It could have been a laugh if Hugh was feeling less pitiful.
"You're life will never be the same Mr Barkridge. To take the life of a brother is to sell your soul to the devil. Fortunately for you, I found you first and will leave you with a punishment that pales in comparison."
"Just do it. Please sir. He has to be okay."
Hugh couldn't remember exactly how, but the next moment he was in his own bedroom, the bell for dinner ringing through the corridors. There was a terrible weight in his gut. It would never leave him. Not ever.

Hugh Barkridge. Murderer. Liar. Holder of great secrets. The child parents wish didn't exist. But it was okay, as long as Alec stayed alive.