A child waiting to grow up turned into an old man longing for childhood. |
Part 1 Johnny woke up with the sun on the first day without school, 1990. He couldn't wait for his summer break to get started. Long days and long nights of running around outside, playing baseball in the backyard with the neighbors, and long games of capture the flag that would eventually have to be paused so everyone could rush home for dinner. Johnny opened the curtains of his window and let the sun shine in and looked outside to see if Kevin, Willy, or Tyler were outside yet. No sign of them. "Ok, I should probably eat breakfast before we play outside, anyway," he thought to himself, but secretly wished he'd see Kevin dart from his back door soon. The four of them shared neighboring yards that felt like they went on forever. Summer had a funny way of making suburban neighborhoods feel like never ending acres of land to explore. The possibilities of games and adventures were limitless. Today, they could build a fort and spy on some of the other neighbors out for a walk with their dog. Maybe they would yell at them and then hide and laugh while the older neighbors tried to figure out where that noise came from. Maybe they would all ride around in circles on their bikes, pretending they were in a marathon Nascar race. Johnny ate his breakfast in three bites, because he could hardly sit still. What a day this was going to be. About thirty minutes later, Johnny got a call from his mom from work. "Hey buddy, what are you doing?" "Hi mom. Just waiting for everyone to wake up so I can go outside." "Well Johnny, don't forget you have to go to the dentist today and then go help your grandma and grandpa pick up sticks in their yard," his mom condemned. "WHAT! It's the first day of summer! You never told me this!" Just as he responded to his mom, he heard a door outside slam shut. Kevin and Tyler were sprinting outside toward his house with a baseball and bat in hand. Their faces spread with smiles, soaking in the early morning sun before it got too hot outside. Johnny slumped. How is this possible? A dentist trip on the first day of summer?! He resented adults always telling him what to and just wanted to be free to have fun. "I can't wait to grow up!" He yelled as he slammed the door shut of the car he'd be riding in to the dentist. "Then I'll be able to do have all the fun I want without anyone telling me what to do!" Part 2 Jonathan left his office job on Wednesday at 5:10, about fifteen minutes earlier than normal, hoping that maybe today he'd beat traffic. The sky was dark with just a hint of orange fading quickly. There were still snow piles in the corner of the parking lot from the storm a couple of days ago, but the roads looked to be fine. It was dark when he left home in the morning and it will be dark when he gets home. "Another day of work done," Jonathan thought to himself. "Thank God the week's almost over." He pulled out his car keys, always in his right pocket, unlocked the car, and plugged his phone, always in his left pocket, in to the charger. He figured he should probably call his wife out of obligation, but wasn't really looking forward to her nagging just yet. Maybe he can wait until he gets home. Jonathan pulled onto the highway and began the 40 minute trek that he does everyday. "Why isn't my radio working?!" Jonathan yelled to no one in particular. He hit it hard, hoping that would fix it. It didn't. It's about to be a long, silent ride home. Jonathan exhaled when he finally saw exit 3B coming up. He thought 30 minutes in silence might be okay without nagging from his bosses or wife, but the time alone with just his thoughts was almost too much. He went back and forth between stress for what he still had to do tonight before work tomorrow and what his wife will make him do around the house. Maybe if he's lucky, he'll be able to go to sleep by 11. He finally proceeded to the exit, but had to quickly slow down when he saw cars stopped in front of him. Leaving 15 minutes early was not going to make a difference. The next 3 miles would take 20 minutes. What did his life come to? He used to love to read books, go for runs, and play basketball with his friends at the gym. Now, it was nearly impossible. He was trapped by the endless responsibilities that came with adulthood. His job provided no hope for a respite from the stress and no engagement to knock him from the tediousness of the daily tasks. Outside his car, he watched as the other people, undoubtedly stuck in the same day to day rut as him, inch forward. He noticed the blue SUV with the Boston Celtics bumper sticker that he saw so many times on the drive home. "I wonder if they feel as trapped as I do," he thought, looking for just a little bit of reassurance that he was not alone. As they finally got moving a little bit, Johnathan again had to begrudgingly come to a quick stop. He laid on his horn. "What the hell is it this time?!" He yelled, again to just himself. There was a school bus with its red lights flashing and its stop signs out dropping off a few kids. Jonathan noticed them running out of the bus and immediately playing in the snow still in their yard. The seemingly younger brother threw a snowball at his older brother, who in retaliation playfully tackled him into the large pile at the end of their driveway. Jonathan resentfully sat and watched, even a couple of seconds after the school bus pulled away. "They have no idea what they have right now," he thought to himself. The freedom to play, the freedom of not having responsibility, of not having to take anything so seriously. He longed for his days as a child when he could do whatever he wanted to do. |