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Bi-polar what it's like |
The other sides of me are different from the me I want to be. The other sides are really different. I have a side that loves God and that wants to love me. I have a side that is fearful and wants to die. I have a side that's dangerous and is bold and rash that's not afraid of anything or one. Here lately the good girl's been in charge, the saved one, the one who's learning to love me. The other sides of me are all a part of me. I am thankful when the good side of me is in charge. The side that wants to die and is too afraid to live scares me. THE SIDE THAT IS DANGEROUS AND RASH ALSO SCARES ME! When I am dealing with the depressed side I am more likely to hurt me. When I am dealing with the manic side of me I am more likely to hurt you. I want the side of me that loves Jesus to stay in charge because he helps me. I want the side that good side to stay in charge because I know Jesus loves me. Because he wants what's best for me. You see there are many sides to me and to us all mentally ill or not. You see we all have another side whether we want to believe it or not. The other sides of me are always there but for now, God is controlling me. So I am safe and you are safe from the other sides of me. My Bipolar is what makes me, me, imaginative, strong, brave, weak. It's what makes me great and also what can destroy me. The other sides of me oh how can this be you say? Well, I can't explain it in a way the so-called normal can understand. I can just tell you it's/they are apart of me. Today I can thank God for all of me. Today I choose to believe little by little Christ is sitting me free. |