Memories love and understanding

Memories is something you don't think about as a child, However as you get older you want save as many memories as possible. Many people keep pictures cause they last a life time, some people keep a journal, and for some they just keep them in there mind for a life time. I am a mother and step mother, i never much though of memories till i was old enough to understand them and now at 29 years old i keep as many as i can. I have lost so many family members to cancer and suicide. I was almost one of them as well. I followed the wrong path and got myself into more then i could handle alone. I felt alone in the world and kept to myself and let people rip me apart and tare me down.
i thought i had found the one person that was going to help me and take care of me, He gave me my kids, my step kids, and a chance to be a mother. little did i know that 10 year of abuse and mental torment would only break me even more. I was left again felling alone but this time i had to hide it, i had to put on a fake smile and tell everyone i was okay, when i wasn't. i let it go on for year just so i would get anyone else hurt. I finally realized that there was another man out there.
This one talked and asked me everyday how i was, asked about my kids and seem through my fake smile and broke through the wall i had put up. Not everyone believes in fairy tales,or true love or God. But i do, i believe this man Matthew was sent to me, by not only god himself but by family members in heaven. I had made so many bad memiores that i kept searaching for good ones and only found a few. Now i am looking forward to making new memories and learning form my past to help me keep on with the good that has entered my life.