Because I Left..

Forced with reality of knowing I am gone,
Ive yet to find my feet nearly a year feels so long.
Lonely as it may seem but for the best it was decided,
You lost your temper too many times and i couldnt hide it.
I lost friends and family to them i always chose you,
Too many chances given so many houses i went through.
A broken heart comes with a broken soul and mending yours was fatal,
You shattered me in every way trying to fix you and i was so unstable.
I have picked myself back up and rebuilt what was left of my tired soul,
You cannot hurt me anymore im stronger and now i have a goal.
I will be alone for a little longer and im at peace with that,
I have to learn to love myself and not fall into your trap.
I used to not know who i was and became someone i didnt know,
Everything or anyone i ever loved was gone and you put on a show,
You made out i was the problem and fed me deciet and lies,
I would mould myself into what you wanted to keep the peace of mind,
You painted such a beautiful picture of our lives together and how its gonna be,
When the time would come it was only a picture and it was a life id never get to see.
Sometimes i wonder if your sorry and if you ever really felt bad,
Then i think of my future your not in it im excited about that.
This new life without you sometimes makes me nervous but it actually soothes my inner fear,
I like the idea of becoming my self again and that your nowhere near me here.
Leaving you was easy but finding myself again has been hard,
The quiet and the lonliness was terrible at the start.
However as hard as its been for you as you dial my number in despair,
Crying to me just one more chance and how youll change and how i left is just unfair,
But i guess you never think of how bad you treated me and how you didnt care.
I suppose it was all my fault though its what you always liked to say.
I am doing so much better without you im becoming happier a little more each day.
I perhaps would like to thank you for destroying my life and making me feel lower than dirt,
So i could have this opportunity to show you and myself that i am more than what you are worth.