The Love of an Amoeba

Once upon a time, an amoeba was joyfully swimming along in a warm pool of water. Suddenly, it felt an intense wave of exhilaration rush through its body. It didn’t need to wonder long where it came from, because a thought inspired by the feeling bloomed inside it; the amoeba loved itself. I adored being by itself and it marveled at how wonderful it was to be an amoeba as amazing as itself.
“When I change my shape,” it thought, “each form I take is perfectly round and squishy. And when I swim and wiggle my pseudopodium, I do so with a transcendent grace that was the envy of any other singe cell organism. By the Carbon, I am so beautiful,” It gushed.
Once again, that feeling of love and happiness burst inside itself, and in that moment it asked the question that every amoeba dreams about, “Do I…” it paused, “Do I want to make another copy of myself? Should I reproduce?”
It stumbled over the last word, because the amoeba knew that this was only something one should do if one truly loved themself, but before it could think any further, it felt a tingle in its elongating nucleus“I’ve never felt this before. Is this what mitotic division feels like?…Oh!” it moaned, “Oh yeah, that feels so good!”
In the glistening water, the Amoeba made sweet, sweet binary fission.“I’m gonna split, I’m gonna split, oh my god I’m gonna split….. ahhh!” It yelled, before it’s nucleus and cytoplasm burst into two.
Suddenly, there was a sister amoeba sitting next to it. “I am even more beautiful now, because there are two of me in this world,” said the two two sister amoebas. The two of them went their separate ways and lived happily ever after, never seeing each other again.