The Tale Of The Pumpkin-Headed Scarecrow

The night was dark. Joe turned and screamed as he saw the scarecrow. It had a pumpkin for a head!

"That crap is the best you can do?"

"I'd like to see you do better. At least it's got all the keywords covered."

"At least? Try at most, 'cause it's got damn all else going for it. 'The night was dark.' Have you ever heard of 'show, don't tell'?"

"Listen pal, who's the muse round here?"

"Muse? That's a good one, judging by the junk you produce. I must have got the last muse in the shop."

"I once worked with Hemingway!"

"Yeah - Fred Hemingway. I've seen the newspaper ads. 'Painters and deccorators'! You do know there's only one 'c' in 'decorator'."

"That was a typo at the printers! OK, smartass, let's see you have a go."

Joe stumbled through the field, barely able to see his hand in front of his face in the moonless night.

"Not bad, huh?"

"You've not used any keyword."

Joe stumbled through the field, barely able to see his hand in front of his face in the DARK, moonless night.

"Happy now?"

"Where's the scarecrow?"

"I've got 300 words to play with! I'll get to the bloody scarecrow!"

"Was that a literal 'bloody' as in the scarecrow is covered in blood, or are you just showing your lack of vocabulary again?"

"You'll be covered in blood in a minute."

"Muses don't bleed."

"Do you want to put that to the test?"

"That's it. I'm done with you, you ungrateful, third-rate hack. I'm out of here."

"Good. Try offering your services to Rowling. That's J A Rowling, drainage and sewerage contractors. Just your level. Now who the hell are you?"

"I'm your new muse. Let me show you how it's done."

The night was dark...



Word Count: 300