Eulogy for a friend |
Beneath Becca's graduation photo in her high school yearbook is written, "There is nothing so irresistibly contagious as laughter and good humor." Simply put, she was a smiler, an easy smiler, a natural smiler. Even when she was serious, the corners of her mouth curved upward. She once quipped it was her duty to smile considering all the money her parents had spent on her teeth. Becca said she was obliged to show them off: her teeth, not her parents. Yes, she could be humorous too. What made Becca smile most broadly were her children. She was so very proud of them and seemed to enjoy motherhood more than most, hardly ever losing patience during any child's vexing life stages. "They DO eventually grow up you know," she'd say. "And then they leave ... all too soon," she'd add. Growing up, Becca's dream was that she would be a full-time HOMEmaker - not a "stay-at-home-mom" - a label she adamantly scorned. She said the label was an offensive and disparaging term, believing that creating a loving home for family was a noble vocation. "Besides," she said, "when does a person ever find moms at home? You'd actually need an appointment to see them at home," she chuckled. Becca noted moms are usually found wherever help was needed: at scout meetings, music lessons, cheerleading, baseball, and soccer practices, painting scenery for school plays, baking cookies for some event. Yes, moms keep the wheels of community rolling forward. In addition to being a fulltime HOMEmaker, Becca dreamed of writing what she called 'The Great American Novel,' right at her kitchen table. "Be careful," she would chide her friends when they'd confess a misdeed, "or I'll put you in my book." Becca knew, down to her very toes, that she would be a writer and was lucky to have a teacher in third grade who recognized her creative ability to put words together. When, for an assignment, she wrote a short poem instead of a six-sentence story her teacher became a willing mentor. Her talent for creatively putting words together took on steam throughout elementary school, through high school and then college. As an adult, her writing earned awards for local news reports and a column she wrote that was published in a few local newspapers. When she was elected as the first female president of a formerly all-male professional journalist's club, one might say she became a large fish in a very tiny pond. Unfortunately, Becca's idyllic dream of writing The Great American Novel came to a crashing halt on becoming a single mom, one of many as the divorce epidemic swept through the boomer generation. Somewhat reluctantly, she stepped into a larger fishbowl - an aquarium actually - finding her niche in The Big City within the world of business-to-business, or B2B, publishing. Becca was often called upon to share her expertise on any one of the many business sectors she covered, appearing on panels, as a guest speaker, or on television as an industry expert. Her special joy was mentoring young journalists. She sure smiled a lot during this phase of her life, especially after finding love again. Becca and her new love were a match alright and enjoyed shared interests, especially travel. They called themselves 'Words and Numbers' - Zach was a CPA. Together they acquired two turtles, Headline and Deadline, as well as two fish, Debits and Credits. Together with her kids and Zach's they became a beautiful, blended family that eventually presented them with seven gorgeous grandchildren, much to their delight. The two spent a glorious retirement doting on children and grandchildren alike. There was endless love to go around, not to mention smiles. Although she never did get to write that novel, Becca lived a full life. "I just can't think of a good story," she would say, although her friends would say she did live a storied life. Becca always said she smiled abundantly because that is how she wanted to be remembered. "When I die, I want the last person I saw to remember me smiling," she would say. I hope Becca smiled at you on her way out. |