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Rated: 18+ · Short Story · Business · #2330441
Barney is newly retired. 300 words
All Day Every Day


Babs Stone stood in the doorway eyeing her husband, Barney.

“Why aren’t you dressed? We have shopping to do.”

“It’s my day off,” Barney mumbled, half-asleep in his favorite recliner.

“You must come with me! I can’t carry all the potting soil, seeds and grow-lights I’ll need.” Babs said patiently.

Barney groaned and climbed out of his chair.

“One day off a week and you need a Sherpa,” he growled.

Babs opened her mouth, then closed it again.

“I’ll try to be as fast as I can, honey. Please!”

Barney looked up at his wife and smiled.

“Okay, but I reserve the right to laze when we’re done.”

Minutes later, he was dressed in his idea of day off wear. Tatty old overalls, a ripped flannel shirt, holey socks and sneakers.

Babs opened her mouth for a second time, shrugged and shut it again.

Two hours later, Barney was back in his recliner with a cold beer, while Babs put away the groceries and started supper. She made her husband’s favorite sandwich with potato chips on the side, placed it on the table beside his chair.

“Want another beer with your lunch?”

He handed her his empty bottle in reply.

Next morning, Barney was up early, dressed in his best suit and packing his briefcase, when Babs came into their bedroom.

“Barney, we have to talk!”

He looked bewildered but sat on the bed.

“What’s the matter?”

“Remember that party we went to last Friday?”

“Party? Oh, you mean my...”

“Yes, that party!”

Sheepishly, Barney removed his office clothes. When he was in his underwear, he added his oldest bathrobe.

“I can’t believe I’d didn’t remember I’m retired now!” he said as he put on his slippers and followed Babs downstairs for a late breakfast together.
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