Motivation

Motivation

Motivation is a fickle thing that seems to be slipping from my fingers once again. Like a skittish rat narrowly avoiding a piece of cheese that is so obviously a trap. It seems these days I have finally found the motivation to write, yet when I try to do anything else, I can only stare at it and wish I was writing. Writing has consumed every aspect of my life and is constantly on my mind, all I want to do is write and write and write. I don't have the motivation to do anything else, and I have so many ideas and things I want to write down. I wish that I could dedicate every hour of my life to writing and just lock myself in a room so that way no one can bother me or make me not focus on my precious writing. This joy that I feel every time I write is intoxicating, and it makes me even more motivated to write and less motivated to do anything else.

I wish that I didn't have to go outside, didn't have to eat, didn't have to drink, didn't have to socialize with anyone. All I wish for is to write these beautiful words that bring me oh so much joy. This is better than any drug or any form of addiction, no, this is divine, truly something holy in nature. It had to be because this doesn't even feel like motivation anymore but instead a revelation. My thoughts no longer have to be lonely and instead can have a space to thrive by and a space to flow without any hesitation or fear of backlash.

It seems these days, my mind is stuck in philosophy, and trying to see anything in a normal fashion is just impossible. I want to analyze everything that I'm doing and everything that is happening around me so that way I can have more to write about. One day, One day I will have people read my stories, if you can even call these stories, and I will have their opinions on me. I hope to become successful with these stories so that way I may dedicate my life to writing. This is my passion, and as much as death is my passion, so is this. So I figure, why not combine both my passions and combine them into something beautiful? I might have trouble writing stories and finding interest, but I can write my own story and my thoughts with the motivation that I have seen. The macabre calls to me, and I will write my feelings on it with a level of excitement none have seen about it before. Motivation gives me the strength to write all that I desire and all that I see. Motivation is the hidden key to the knowledge which I have stored in the library of my mind. Motivation is all that I seek now, and I practically salivate at the thought of feeling motivated.

I hope that I get to keep this motivation, and if it is stolen from me, I will feel lost once again without it. I now can't imagine a world without my writing, and truly, I want to use the motivation I have been granted to do something great with it. I ponder how others use their motivation, do they use it for trivial matters important speeches, or are they like me, and do they pursue their life passion with all the motivation they can be granted by the universe? Using motivation for anything other than important or passionate boggles my mind. To not pursue what makes their heartburn makes my mind ache, and my bones creak. Everyone should feel motivated to pursue their passion, and if they don't, I putty them from a hypocritical standpoint. At one point, I didn't have the motivation to write, but now I do.

Such a trivial matter, I'm afraid, but I will not let this motivation pass me any longer, as with each passing day, I get better and better at what I do.