sleeping awake

I was always quiet. I, according to my mother the amateur psychologist, was withdrawn and I was shy. (Well, Mom, hate to break it to ya, but even I knew that!) I also had three sisters, two of which were older. Claire, my oldest, supposedly wisest sister, was loud, outspoken, and motherly, not to mention the most popular girl in the entire high school. Ava, my second older sister, was artistic and dramatic, and she was always up for a new part in a play or she would do out of the blue, spontaneous things I only dreamed about. She was fearless. Then, there was my little sister Melanie. She was so tomboyish that if she had a you-know-what she'd be one. She loved to climb trees and kick soccer balls around, not to mention play football with the boys. But worst of all, as according to my disgusted mother, she refused to wear a dress.

So, yeah, we were all different. But I was always even more of an oddball, because I could never find anyone like me. Claire had everybody, Ava had the drama club, and Melanie had all the people she spent time with in sports. But I wasn't in those types of things, because I was too afraid to join. I knew I was missing out, especially when all those girls came giggling from choir, or when all the drama club kids would bow at their latest production, smiling like angels from the heavens above. I desperately wanted to fit into their crowd, but I didn't know what I wanted to do. That was the hardest part, because to figure it out I had to figure out myself.
Being the age I was, I was already going through enough stupid crap to be in this situation, but I was, sadly, too shy to even try to make friends. Then, Lola McGregor came along and changed my whole life by just sitting with me at lunch.