MY SELF-CENTERED HUBBY

MY SELF-CENTERED HUBBY

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He was bowling with his buddies
When I was sitting home alone;
He was busy with his cronnies
And never thought to phone!

He always has a place to go
That doesn't include his wife,
When I told him I was unhappy,
He just said "Get a Life!"

When he heard me say "I do"
He thought he had it made,
I could do the cooking and cleaning
While he enjoyed all the shade!

For my birthday I got a washer,
A large fancy one, at that!
He brought me his dirty laundry
Thinking that was that!

He said he was going snorkeling,
He'd be back when he was done;
But I finally reached my limit
And thought I'd have some fun!

I told him that the washer broke
And he looked really annoyed;
But he bent down to take a look
And fell right into the void!

The washer door shut and filled
With water, he could swim!
I couldn't wait to see his face
As the cycle moved to spin.

'Round and round he snorkeled,
Eyes giving me a glare;
I grabbed my purse and walked away
And left him spinning there.

His buddies came and saved him,
I heard he couldn't understand,
Why I would do such a thing
To such a good, kind-hearted man.

My self-centered hubby divorced me,
Best thing that he'd ever done;
At last I'm free to enjoy and see
The last of that worthless bum!

Countrymom
2/28/04