THE WEDDING

Sandra walked into the chapel and noticed a mirror on the far left wall. She glanced at her silhouette and looked astonished at what she saw. Thirty-five years old and still had her coke bottle figure, with the exception of five extra pounds. The friend that designed the dress did a beautiful job, slenderizing the waist, and flaring in the hip area, the extra pounds seemed to vanish. Wearing sling back heels giving it a trendy look, copying of the young Kennedy bride.

Sandra stood there for a minute, and thought "Simply beautiful," she smiled as she proceeded.

Sandra dreamt of this day many times as a child, "The day has finally come," she thought. Marching down the aisle arm and arm with her father, she glanced at him. He had tears falling down his cheeks. She thought, "He's probably thinking, finally someone is taking her and I pray they don't give her back."

She glanced at the groom, John; a tall well built man with his hair neatly cut and for a moment she thought, "Is this my life."

As she walked slowly down the isle she noticed everyone standing, looking her way. There was her boss, and some neighbors. Her thought was "Can I pull this off?"

At last everyone was at the altar, Sandra was minutes away from becoming Mrs. Sandra Barr.
Pastor Smith began as soon as they approached, saying, "Who gives this woman?"
Her Father said, "Her Mother and I do."
The Pastor continued saying "If anyone object let them speak now or forever hold their peace?" As instructed by Sandra. Sandra looked frantic as she searched the pews, but no one said anything, she discharged a sigh of relief.

The Pastor went on with the ceremony. Sandra began scratching under her arm. She looked around to see if anyone had noticed, the Groom did. He looked as if she had interrupted the service.
She said out loud "What," turning toward the Groom, he did'nt respond.

Sandra started sweating, she turned around and said "Is it hot in here or is it me," but no one spoke. Interrupting the Pastor again, "Give me a minute," she said walking and sitting next to her Mother and fanning her face with her Mothers program. She could feel her Mother staring at her in amazement but said nothing. She sat there for two minutes, according to the clock.

Returning to the alter Sandra noticed a frown on the Grooms face and with each moment it grew worst.

From the pew John's Mother grew impatient as she stared at this so-called wedding. John's mother Betty Barr stood and attempted to say "What----,"
Sandra turned with a look on her face and said "WE ARE PAST THAT PART, NOW SIT DOWN AND SHUT YOUR FACE," with a voice of authority strong as if she were possessed by the devil.
Betty turned with an embarrassed look, sat without a word.
Sandra turned back to Pastor Smith and said, "Okay, start again."

Pastor looked at her with this apprehensive look as if he were thinking, "Poor Fellow." As he began to speak, Sandra interrupted again stretching her arms. she turned and everybody's mouths were wide open in shock.
Sandra said, "I'm nervous does anyone have any Viagra".
The crowd all said "oh" similtaneously.
Sandra turned and looked at John, the Groom, his mouth wide open, and she put her hand over her mouth, turned in haste and said "Prosac, I mean Prosac.

John took two steps backward before Sandra grabbed him by the arm and said "After we say I do we have to find a closet and ----" she placed her hand over his ear and whispered,just as she finished.
John yelled, "I do."
They both turned to the Pastor who reluctantly pronounced them husband and wife.

Mr. Edwards began clapping and laughing, as he walked toward the altar. Approaching the alter he said, "Well done," reaching in his pocket for the check made out to John and Sandra Barr for $1,000,000.00. He handed it to John as he explained that the wedding was taped for a reality show, Titled, "I DARE YOU," "Your wife had to appear crazy for five minutes and still get you to marry her before qualifing for the check".