Fever Seizure

Fever Seizure

          My son has got a fever. Not again! It always terrifies me because, for him, it is not an ordinary fever. Once he gets a fever, there’s a big chance that it can go up very high. How high? As high as 104F. Not only this, but it can also lead to a seizure if it is severe. I know that fever seizure sometimes happens at his age. It has happened to him three times, and I don’t ever want to see him like that again. Please not again.

          Whenever it has happened, I have prayed “Please, please bring my child back! I’ll do anything to get him out of this.” The seizure doesn’t usually last very long, only 10 to 20 seconds, but this short time seems like forever to me. In this short 10 seconds my brain is jumbled by flashbacks of his lovable face, his adorable smiles, and every single part of him. “Give him back!” I am clueless. The health guide that I have is nicely suggesting to me: “Try to stay calm. Do not try to hold him down. Time the length of seizure.” OK, but I’m sorry. I might not be a good mother, but I can’t do anything once I see that my child is unconscious, that his eyes are rolling back, and that he is shaking right in front of me. “Come on, help us!”

          After the horrible seizures are over, I cannot get these thoughts and images out of my head. It is just like a psychological conditioning experiment. When a door bell rings, a dog starts drooling because he expects to be given food. There is a relationship between the response and the presentation of the reinforcement. Now I’m like a dog. Once I touch my child’s forehead, all the flashbacks start in my head.

          I hope he is old enough to handle the fever seizure this time. Once children pass the age of five, it usually stops. One thing that is certain, I’m not growing enough to handle it. All I can do is waiting for him to give me a smile again tomorrow morning.