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Rated: 13+ · Short Story · Friendship · #963798
A girl who is scared to be with the boy she wants.
It was the first day of Mekelle’s junior year of high school. She had on her favorite outfit which consisted of a white Guess baby tee shirt, baby blue Guess pants, her baby blue Guess jacket and her K-Swiss shoes. She loved wearing the latest styles because people would envy the clothes that she wore. She was not excited about school, actually she hated school. She could not wait to see her friends so that they could talk about their summer.
Mekelle was at the lunch table with her friends Diana and Kia. Mekelle was eating a tuna salad sandwich with an apple and her half-frozen water.
“Why you eat so healthy?” Diana asked her.
“This what my mom packed for me,” Mekelle lied. Her mother hadn’t packed a lunch for her since she was in eighth grade. Mekelle always watched what she ate in fear of being fat again.
“Have you seen the freshmen?” Kia asked.
“Yea, they look like babies,” Mekelle said laughing.
“How old are they, like 14?” Kia asked.
“Probably. Remember when we were freshmen, two years ago?” Diana said.
“Oh yeah, and that first week was horrible,” Mekelle said.
“I’m glad freshman year is over,” Kia said.
Mekelle got up to throw her trash away. When she looked at the freshman lunch table, she noticed a boy sitting there. He had black hair that was cut into a fade and dark brown eyes with honeysuckle brown skin. He looked up at her and smiled. Mekelle rolled her eyes at him and briskly walked back to her table.
“We saw you lookin’ at that little boy,” Diana said.
“Naw. You saw wrong. He was looking at me,” Mekelle said.
“Whatever! You looked at him first,” Kia said.
Throughout the day Mekelle thought about the boy from the lunch table. She thought he was cute but she told herself that she could not like him because he was a freshman and she a junior. As she was about to walk into Drama, her last class of the day ,she saw him again. She was taken by surprise, but she held her composure. The bell rang, and she took a seat at the back of the classroom. She couldn’t believe her eyes when she saw him walk into the classroom. The teacher made everyone introduce themselves.
“Hi, my name is Jason Williams, I’m a freshman.” Jason said. As he was speaking Mekelle kept looking at him. She thought the way he talked was cute because his voice was still a little high. She did not want to be obvious so she started to look through her planner to pass time. Time passed as she thumbed through the pages, then came her time to speak.
“Ms. Simmons could you introduce yourself to the class,” the teacher asked. Mekelle stood up shifting her weight to the left side of her body. Her arms were folded out of nervousness.
“My name is Mekelle, and I’m a junior,” said Mekelle. She sat down with relief. Throughout the whole class period all Mekelle could think about was Jason. She was excited about her new crush, but she could not tell anyone. She wanted to keep her reputation up and liking an underclassman would taint it. There was also the fact that she had a boyfriend. Her teacher brought her out of thought.
“Ms. Simmons, your partner is Jason,” The teacher said.
“Partner for what?” Mekelle asked.
“I see you weren’t paying attention. The assignment is for you and your partner to look up a play for two people and perform it in front of the class.”
“Oh,” Mekelle said.
The bell rang and the students got up. Jason walked over to Mekelle.
“So when do you want to go to the library?” he asked her.
“I don’t care,” Mekelle said, putting her notebook in her book bag.
“Tomorrow maybe?”
“Um…yeah, whatever.”
“Maybe….. we should exchange numbers.”
“Just because we’re partners doesn’t mean that you can get my number….but I’ll think about it,” Mekelle said.
“I’m not trying to get with you, just to let you know,” Jason said.
“Yeah cause you don’t have a chance.. I was just lettin’ you know.”

Mekelle sat down in the McDonalds restaurant with her chicken salad and her pink lemonade. Her boyfriend, Aries, sat across from her. He was 6”2, 350 pounds, and not attractive in the face. The reason Mekelle was with him was because she did not want to be lonely.
“Why are you eating that?” Aries said as he stuffed his face one of the three Quarter Pounders he ordered.
“Chicken is healthy,” Mekelle said.
“You’re getting fat, and I think you need to watch what you eat.”
Mekelle looked at her salad and decided not to eat it. She pushed it to the side of her. Aries took it. Jason, who happened to be sitting near over heard the couple’s conversation and shook his head.
“Well I have a duo to perform in two weeks, and my partner is a freshman.”
“Who is the freshman?” Aries asked as he ate her salad.
“This boy named Jason.”
“Oh, so your partner’s a guy?”
“Yeah, is that a problem?”
“Yeah I got a problem. You’re spending your time with some other guy.”
“You don’t have nothing to worry about, especially a boy who is five years younger than you.”
“Why are you taking drama class anyway? I thought you couldn’t read.”
“I might be dyslexic, but I can read! And you know it!” Mekelle yelled.
“Well, you were the one in special ed when you were younger.”
Mekelle eyes began to fill with tears. She was teased so much when she was younger. She grew out of her chubby phase, and she learned how to deal with her learning disability. She was emotionally scarred from the taunting and teasing she endured as a child. Mekelle walked out of the restaurant and to the city bus stop. Aries went after her.
“What’s wrong with you?” Aries asked her.
“My bus is about to be here,” Mekelle said with an attitude.
“Well call me later on tonight,” Aries said, then he proceeded down the street.
When Mekelle got home she did one hundred sit-ups and fifty push-ups. When she was done she looked at herself in the mirror. She saw a 5”7, 130 pound girl. She was not fat in other people eyes but in her eyes, and the eyes of her boyfriend she was. She sat on her bed and started to think about Jason again. She could not believe that she like a boy who she barely knew. She smiled to herself when she remembered how he wanted her number. She decided that she would give it to him.

For two weeks Jason and Mekelle spent time working on their assignment. When it was time for them to perform they did an excellent job and they both got A’s. The next day Mekelle was sitting with Diana and Kia at their usual table. Diana and Kia were eating pizza; Mekelle was eatting an apple.
“I heard your assignment went well,” Kia said.
“I am a proud owner of an A,” Mekelle said smiling.
“I think you smilin’ about somethin’ else, and it’s not that A you got,” Diana said.
“What you talkin’ about Diana?” Mekelle asked.
“You know what I’m talkin’ about. I am talkin’ bout him over there,” Diana said pointing at the freshmen table.
“Jason?” Mekelle said.
“Yes. I think you got somethin’ for him,” Kia said.
“Um, remember, he’s 14, and I don‘t like boys, I like men, and it was just an assignment,” Mekelle said.
“Yea, we’ll see,” Diana said taking a bite of her pizza.
In drama class Mekelle sat in her usual spot in the back. Jason sat next to her. Through the entire class period they passed notes back to each other. The notes did not say anything special. They were having general conversation since they didn’t talk much outside of the class. Mekelle found out that Jason shared her love for acting and Charles Chaplin films, and that he hated the drama teacher as much as her. These were only a few of the things that they had in common. Mekelle decided to keep the notes they wrote, and she put them up in her locker. Mekelle wanted something to remember Jason by and saving the notes was it.
When Mekelle got home she did her routine of one hundred sit-ups and fifty pushups. During her exercises she thought about why she was with her boyfriend. He did not treat her with the respect that she deserved, and he was unattractive. Jason on the other hand was nicer to her, and she was attracted to him. She did not want to break up with Aries because she did not want to hurt him, and Jason was younger than her. If she decided to date Jason she would be the talk, and possibly, the laughing stock of the school.That was something that she did not want.

On the last day of school before winter break Mekelle decided to clean out her locker. She had the typical junk that any high school student would have, old test papers, teen magazines, books. Then she looked at the top shelf of her locker. She found all of the notes that she and Jason had passed for the past four months. She sat next to her locker and put the notes in order. The notes went from general conversation to flirting. She had the biggest crush on him now, and she knew that it was not going to go away easily. As she was putting the notes back into her locker, Jason stopped at her locker.
“Why are you still here?” Jason asked Mekelle.
“I was cleaning out my locker,” Mekelle said, closing her locker door.
“Oh... Are you catching the bus home?”
“Yeah.”
“I’ll just wait for you then.”
They stood around the locker talking for another hour. Mekelle enjoyed the time that she was spending with him even if it was in secret. Mekelle was in the middle of telling about her first year of high school when Jason came out of nowhere and kissed her. Mekelle did not know what to do. She was in shock, and her body froze. It took her a couple of seconds to realize what was happening to her. His lips were soft and the kiss was sweet, but Mekelle felt that it was wrong. She pulled away.
“I have a boyfriend. I.. can’t do this,” Mekelle said. Jason looked as if his heart had broken into two.
“I’m sorry... I shouldn’t have done that,” Jason said.
“It’s okay,” Mekelle said, putting on her jacket. They walked out of the school feeling weird. They had small talk on the bus, and then Jason got off at his stop. Mekelle got off at the next stop. On her way home she knew that things were not going to be the same. Mekelle felt bad because she loved the kiss because it was the sweetest kiss that she had ever had, but she knew that it was wrong.

In January school started again. All of her classes were the same and Mekelle knew that she would see Jason in her drama class. Mekelle sat at the lunch table with her celery sticks and low fat ranch dressing. Diana was sick with the flu so it was just Kia with her.
“Kia ...I have a confession,” Mekelle said as she dipped her celery stick.
“Let me guess, you killed someone?” Kia said sarcastically.
“No,” Mekelle said. She took a deep breath. “Remember when you and Diana said I liked Jason?”
“Yea. Oh, let me guess, you did.”
“I still do and... he kissed me right before winter break.”
“WHAT!!!!!!” How could you keep that from me?!”
“I tried to forget that it happened, but I couldn’t. I feel bad because I cheated on Aries.”
“I can’t believe you kissed a baby.”
“Please don’t tell anyone, not even Diana.”
“Don’t worry. I won’t tell.”

In drama class there was a high amount of tension between Mekelle and Jason. Mekelle was scared to approach him because she did not know how to act around him. Should they talk about what happened between them or act like it never happened? Jason came over to say hi to her, and she froze up. She barely got hi out of her mouth. He took a seat at the front of the class and started to talk to some other people. Mekelle felt bad because she wanted to say more, but nothing came out. During the class she kept downing herself. She did not deserve Jason and was going to try to stop liking him. She thought that they could just be friends and leave it at that. In order to get over him she had to hate him for some reason, so she decided not to be nice to him anymore. She forced herself to think that he just wanted to use her. She was sure that was the way to make her crush go away.
Mekelle was at her locker getting ready to go home. She saw Jason walking down the hall and began to act like she was getting her books. Jason came up to her.
“Hey Mekelle,” he said.
“Why are you talking to me?” Mekelle said with an attitude.
“I was just trying to be nice. What’s wrong with you?!”
“Just get out of my face!” Mekelle said, slamming her locker door shut.
“What’s your problem?!” Jason yelled at her. Mekelle pushed him out of her way. His cd player that was in his hand fell onto the floor. Mekelle just kept walking without looking back.

For the next two months Jason and Mekelle kept their distance from each other. During that time Mekelle spent more time with Aries, and Jason got together with a girl in freshman math class. Every time Mekelle saw them in the hall, she cringed. She missed Jason. She knew her reasoning for not liking him was dumb. How could she ever think that he would use her? She wanted to be friends with him again but she was scared to make the first move. Mekelle decided to work on her relationship with Aries, but nothing changed. He was still mean but she forced herself to love him. While sitting in her drama class on a cold March day, Jason came over to where she was. He broke the two-month silence.
“Hey,” he said to her.
“Hi,” Mekelle replied.
“I’m… sorry,” Jason said sincerely.
“What are you apologizing for? You didn’t do nothin’ wrong.”
“I must have since you stopped talking to me.”
“I was going through some stuff, and I just took it out on you, and I’m sorry.
Jason took a seat next to Mekelle, and they wrote notes back to each other during the class. Mekelle enjoyed talking to him again, and for some reason she felt better.
After school when everyone was gone, Jason came up to Mekelle at her locker while she was getting her pink Sherlin coat.
“Why are you with him?” he asked her. Mekelle stopped putting on her coat and looked at him.
“I don’t know. I love him I guess.”
“He doesn’t treat you right.”
“He treats me okay.”
“Whatever. I saw ya’ll in McDonalds. Why the hell is he callin’ you fat when he as big as a house? You deserve better Mekelle.”
“He loves me in his own way.”
“That’s not love, and it’s sad that you see it that way.”
Mekelle could not say anything. She knew that Jason was telling the truth. Aries did not love her. All he ever did was put her down.
“I’m with him because I’m afraid of being alone,” She revealed as her eyes started to water.
“You don’t have to be alone. You have me,” Jason said. Mekelle’s heart was beating so fast that it felt like it was going to jump out of her chest.
“Don’t you have a girlfriend?” Mekelle asked.
“Not anymore. Mekelle, I want to be with you. You’re the prettiest girl I have ever seen. We have so much in common, and I’m not take no for an answer. I heard what your boyfriend said to you, calling you dumb and fat. You’re not fat and you’re not dumb. You’re perfect to me.”
“It’s not that easy, I just can’t go with you. Do you know what people in school will say? I’ll get called all types of names for going with someone as young as you.”
“Why do you care about what other people think?”
Mekelle took a deep breath. She had never really told anyone about her childhood other than Aries. She was hesitant at first because she remembered how Aries used her secrets to put her down. Jason was the opposite of Aries, and she felt a comfort when she talked to him. Mekelle had tears streaming down her face.
“When I was younger I was teased because I was fat and dyslexic. I was called all types of hurtful names. That is why I act the way I do now. I exercise constantly because I don’t want to get fat again. I always try to get good grades because I don’t want anyone to know that I have a learning disability. I’m constantly worried about my appearance because I don’t want to get talked about. I wish I could be carefree but I am too scared. Do you understand?”
“Well that explains why you only talk to me when no one is around. So you’re telling me that you are willing to sacrifice your happiness for other people’s approval of you?”
Mekelle could not reply. Everything that he was said was true. She appeared happy on the outside, but she was miserable on the inside. The only time she was truly happy was when she was with Jason. She wanted to have that feeling all the time, but she was still scared about what other people would say.
“Can we change the subject?” Mekelle asked Jason.
“Yea,” Jason said disappointed.


When Mekelle got home she stood in front of her mirror looking at herself. She saw a dark brown girl with hazel eyes and curly hair who was not fat. This was the first time in six years that she saw her body as perfect, and she felt good about herself. She was sick of trying to live up to other people’s standards. She wanted to be carefree and she wanted to be able to like whoever she wanted. Mekelle reclaimed herself, and she needed to make some changes in her life. Mekelle looked at her phone and decided that she needed to make a phone call.
“Hello, may I speak to Aries,” Mekelle said into the phone.
“Hey Mekelle.”
“Look, I am going to make this as easy as possible. I’m not happy in this relationship and I don’t think you are either.
“What are you talking about?”
“I think we need to go our separate ways,” Mekelle said nervously.
“Are you breaking up with me?! You can’t break up with me!”
“Aries, I think it’s the best.”
“Yeah, whatever. I am the only one that will put up with you. You are nothing without me! Who’s going to want someone who’s fat and dumb? Nobody wants you Mekelle. You’ll be crawling back to me and begging me to take you back!”
“You never treated me right. You always called me names, and you never respected me. I don’t need someone who is going to bring me down!” Mekelle said. She slammed the phone down.
Mekelle went into the kitchen and sat down at the table. She saw the cake that her mother baked the night before in the middle of the table. She took her finger and dipped it into the white frosting and licked it off. She hadn’t had any type of sweets since she went on her diet when she was in the eighth grade. Her tongue jumped as it felt the sweet icing going across her taste buds. She cut herself a slice of the cake and indulged herself. While she was eating, she thought about Jason. She couldn’t wait to see him in school tomorrow so that she could tell him that she would be his girlfriend.
© Copyright 2005 Princess Ebone' Sherell (jacie02 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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