Human and time

In a low light of a lamp, in the dark room, again a pen in my hand I am trying to write something about my thoughts on the white paper before me. I have engaged in writing like today’s many times before. The poetries I wrote those times were about different things, but unlike then, today I did not want to compose a poem, instead I have preferred to write on prose. To tell truth, today I wished to write a poetry, but… could not or just thought that it would be hard for me to convey my thoughts with versification. “Thoughts”… sometimes people have a queer feeling, you know that there are some thoughts on your brain, but you cannot guess and do not know what they are. Now I also have the same feeling and want to say that once have I finished this writing I will tear this paper and throw to the bin. Shortly, this is only a desire to write.
The time is elapsing and as it is doing so, the seconds and minutes are passing, too. The hands of the clock are still moving to the right. Sometimes I have varied ideas. For example, if I could move the time back with moving these hands to the left. I say, how great it would be then! I do not want it for the unforgettable and nice days I had before. I want it, because I have made many mistakes in my past days and now want to correct them… The reason why this wish was born is that the repentance is a very bad case for me. But it is true that, I do not make the same mistakes that I have repented any more. And of course, it is good.
Generally, I do not like watching the time, because it is always moving.
Once I had a talk with my friends. I told them that each second, each minute we live turns a history afterwards. At first sight, this saying can seem simple to you as it was for my friends. But here is other meaning. For example, I am writing on this paper what comes to my head. Everything looks normal, I am writing and what I write is engraved on the paper.
A second has passed then two seconds, then three…
Now pay attention, although the “sentence” I wrote some seconds before had looked normal, now it is not. So, the time when I wrote the “sentence” remained in the history. Even tomorrow or the day after tomorrow or next week, generally, for all times the seconds which looked normal will be “history”… (Sometimes we say the phrase “the nearest history”, just our present time is “the nearest history”).
We live – awake in the morning; some people go to school, some to work, some stay at home and etc, but in the evening we again come home and then sleep. And we call this period – from awaking in the morning through sleeping in the evening “a day”. Thus, our each day turns history. Once Imam Ali said: “Each taken breath is a step to death”. We are also striding, it seems to some direction. Have not you ever been to earth covered with fine snow? On each step you put a track and when you turn back you see your steps on the snow and remember your striding there some seconds ago. I did not give this example without reason. With this example I want to say that our days are also our steps. But, if we can see our steps on the earth covered with snow, then where are our steps in the life seen?
There is a proverb: “Do not put your work tomorrow”. I have a respect to this saying, because have always seen its truth. And according to my experience I say that, if you have put your work tomorrow, you will not do it tomorrow either.
I have asked a question: Where are our steps in the life seen? Perhaps, everybody has their own answer to this, and so do I. Before telling you my answer I will ask you another question: “What have you gained in your previous day?” I suppose, now you guessed what I have been thinking of. To ground my thought, I will give an example: Now I am learning a foreign language and each day learning the meaning of one word is very a big thing for me.
In each day we must gain something and if achieve something it will be seen on our step. I have not told about time in vain. Most people seeing that they have gained nothing in each past day want to go old times, but unfortunately, the hands are moving only to the right.
At the present time, what I am writing is directed to young people than elderly. We lose many things in each day, but gain if we want. Again in this time, I remember Imam Ali’s words: “Unfortunately, people awake only in the last days of their life”. Do not think that this saying has a relationship only with the religion. Here is other meaning. A time will come when you ask yourselves, it is no doubt: “But what have I gained in these 60, 70 or 80, 90 years…?!”
That time you will remember the “steps” – the days you had in you life. It is like looking at the earth covered with snow… There are many people who had spent their lives in vain and specially, these people will not see anything on the snow, because they have done nothing deserving “a step”. And of course, it is their fault.
Now I want to finish my writing and wish you to know the appraisal of your days and hope, when you ask yourselves at the elderly age what you have gained in this life, your answer will not be “nothing”.
By the way, the hands are still moving…