You are my date with destruction

“Look, it just won't work out, it never would have” you watch as she breaks down, tears flooding her face.

“You cold bastard!” she snapped at you. This isn’t the first time you’ve been called that, and your sure it wont be the last. It's been spat in your face so many times, it's lost all meaning, now when you hear it, it's just like someone’s calling out your name. In response, you just shrug a heartless shrug and begin to saunter away.

“Don’t you fucking walk away from me!” you hear her screech from behind you. You ignore her demand and just quicken your pace.

“I said don’t fucking walk away. You owe me an explanation at least!” she runs to catch up with you and pulls violently at the arm of you t-shirt to halt your movement.

“No I don’t!” ‘God that sounded harsh’ you think to yourself, you never meant for it to sound so cold. Truth be told, you never meant for any of this. This isn’t how it's supposed to be, you and her were never soul mates, and you knew that. You took advantage, you corrupted her, you stole her innocence, you trashed her dreams. You promised her all you couldn’t be, to you it was just fun, another soul to shatter, another heart to toy with, but to her, it was every thing. You were her saviour, her reason for being.

“I don’t understand this.” She wrapped her arms tightly around your left one and sobbed helplessly into your t-shirt.

“That’s just it, you're so damn naïve! Just…. Just grow up” you fiercely jerk your arm from her strong grip and look down at her. She looks so childish, so infantile, so juvenile.

“I am grown up, im only four years younger then you!” and as much to her despite she pouts, now you can't but realise, she is just a girl, an adolescent teenager throwing a temper tantrum.

“But you're still only 17!” you run a shaky hand through your tangled hair. Whats happening to you? You seem as if your losing your nerve. The ice cold demeanour of yours is melting rapidly beneath you, the pedestal you so proudly put yourself on is crumbling at your feet.

“Yeah, but I love you” She pleads. You freeze at her words. You swear your heart stopped beating, just for a second, but not from joy.

“No you don’t” you state plainly, and casually fling a hand in the air, dismissing the notion.

“How would you know? You never ask me how I feel.” She starts sobbing again, her bottom lip quivering.

“Well maybe I never cared!” there it is again, that cold tone of voice, you don’t mean to use it, sometimes you don’t even know when you're using it, but it just manages to bleed its way in. She acts as if you never spoke those words.

“We can work this out, I know we can. What we have is so strong.” Her eyes are pleading with you, to reach out and touch her, comfort her.

“No it's not. For something to be strong, it has to be built on trust, and love and friendship.” You ignore her pleading eyes, now they don’t work there childish magic on you.

“BUT I STILL LOVE YOU!” she screams, pulling on your t-shirt so your faces are inches apart. You lazily roll your eyes, and stand up straight. She doesn’t relinquish her hold on you, she just lets her arms stretch to your level.

“You don’t love me” you mumble under your breath.

“Yes I do” She reassures you.

“NO! you're too young. You're too young to know what love is!, to know what any of this is” You pull a disgusted face. Slowly she lets the material slip through her fingers and unsteadily backs away.

“So what was this?” her voice is shaky and weak, her lip still quivering and fresh tears are streaking her face. You plunge at her lips, it’s the only thing you can think of to stop her crying. You play softly with her bottom lip, it seems you’ve rendered her docile, but then you bite down harder, now your not playing. You keep applying more pressure, you hear her little whimpers of pain but it just urges you on. She’s confused, she’s not sure what or why your doing this, but she knows she doesn’t like it. She starts pushing against your chest in a feeble attempt to stop you, but you just wrap your arms tight around her waist and pull her towards you.

“Stop” you hear her murmur, but you don’t, not yet. You just keep pushing harder on her lip. But then you feel it, the thick metallic taste you were waiting for, fills your mouth and you sigh in relief, relief from what, your not sure, but still you feel it.

“This is anything but love” you whisper. You run a finger across her bleeding lip and watch, making sure she’s watching, as the blood trickles down your finger.

“It was simply lust”