circle of masks

Circle of Masks

*Author’s note: For simplicity sake, a line across the page indicates a major shift in time, place, or the end of a dream.There are four parts to this piece, if I can even call it that. Each individual part has it own title. Read and enjoy or not, no one is forcing you to do so*

Tree of Crying Ice
It is dark. I see nothing. I am in nothing. It’s cold too. Cold and nothing. Wait, I see a door. I feel a door. Light is shining under this door. I put my hand in this light. Warm, this light is warm. I find the door handle and my hand opens the door. The light didn’t lie. It is warm and bright. Too bright to see what’s in front of me. I walk through, anything’s better than the nothing.
Vast, this place is vast. The sky is a pure blue, no clouds, no sun, but I am still warm. How can that be? I don’t care, just as long as it stays warm. Shallow water covers the ground and ripples as I walk across its surface. Strangely enough, I cannot see my reflection. I soon forget this though, as I see something else that catches my eye.
Of in the distance, a tree sticks out of the water. A huge tree, reaching the sky and poking into whatever is beyond the sky here. I walk towards the tree. I am fascinated by it. There is no island, and the water around the tree is still shallow. How did it get here? I look straight up the tree through the lush leaves and branches. Beautiful.
I touch the trunk of the tree with the palm of my hand and pull away in pain. Sorry, but freezer burn is the only idea that came to my mind. The tree is cold, a painfully cold tree. I look up at the tree again; there are no more leaves or strong branches. The tree is now a skeleton of nature. Did I do this? Perhaps I shouldn’t have touched it. My luck, I kill the tree.
To avoid any more damage on my part, I turn around to find the door. The door, where is the door? I run across the water to where I could have sworn the door was. I put my head down in a sigh, again, my luck. I see my face in the water, and I forget about the insignificant door.
My face is not my face, but a mask. A white, plain mask covering all of my face except my left eye is my face. I try to pull the mask off, but it is imbedded into my skin. It is my skin. I struggle and I struggle, but to no avail, I am not victorious. I fall to my knees and cry, but stop when I hear the music. A lullaby almost, no words, just a calming tune that dries my tears.
The music comes from the tree, where now, I am not alone. Other people are there, all in masks. They dance around the tree, a slow mesmerizing dance. Mesmerized, I walk towards the tree to meet my new friends. Before I could make it there, they disappear. Stop and fade away, one waves bye to me. I run, screaming for them to come back. They’re gone. I am alone in a beautiful place that I slowly began to realize is not that beautiful…
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I woke up to the alarm clock ringing to 5:30am. I got up and shook my head, what a strange dream. But this dream was not new to me. I had been having it for the past couple of days. Casandra, my cat, jumped from her usual drawer in my dresser to greet me on the bed. I petted her and began my morning ritual that never changed and probably never will. I grabbed some clothes from my closet and headed down the hall to the bathroom. It was my bathroom, one of the perks of being an only child. Mom and Dad weren’t home, nope, already at work.
After a quick shower, I made my way down the stairs into the kitchen where I made myself some English muffins. Of course, I had to feed Casandra first, who was dying from hunger and had resorted to rolling on the ground in pain. I ate my breakfast, grabbed my backpack, and walked out the door. Boring? Yes, but effective enough for me every morning. Outside, I remembered to lock the back door. Yesterday, I forgot and my forgetfulness led to two unwelcome guests raiding the fridge. I can remember just about anything a person says, but when it comes to things I have to do, well, not so much.
After making sure the back door was locked, I walked across the street to Zoe’s. Zoe was my best friend, a crazy inventor but my best friend. Her house was directly across from mine. Her home was a little bit smaller than mine, but with just her and her brothers living in it, I guess it was pretty big for three people. Zoe’s parents were never home, a permanent business vacation. The only way Zoe knew they were alive was because her parents sent money in the mail for them. I’ll stop there because I don’t like talking about Zoe’s parents, and I know Zoe doesn’t like anyone talking about her parents.
I rung the doorbell at the door and waited patiently. It took a while for someone to answer the door. I didn’t care. While I waited, I noticed the crack in the first step that John promised he’d fix and I noticed the still broken screen door thrown on the side of the yard, Scott claimed he would fix that. John and Scott were Zoe’s older twin brothers, the men of the house and all that jazz.
Zoe, with a pop tart in her mouth, answered the door and quickly closed it. I thought I heard something hit the door, but I wasn’t sure. Zoe spat out the pop tart, “A little early today. You could have warned me.”
“You’re complaining?” I was referring to Zoe’s brothers. I knew Zoe would get the joke.
“Yeah, I guess I can’t complain.” Another thud was heard at the door, and instinctively, Zoe said, “Let’s get the heck out of here.”
We walked to school, did it every morning, rain or shine. We were just a couple blocks away.
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Subview High wasn’t a small school in building size, but in population, it was huge. Big boom or something. Why anybody in his/her right mind would want to move out here…I don’t know. Even with the population, kids still knew who other kids were. By name or face, I could recognize many kids. I doubt it went the other way for me though. I had normal, what every sophomore should have classes, and I was fine was fine with that.
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The bell rang, dismissing us from third hour. Lunch was next, and the only period of time in school I looked forward to. I saw Zoe and her brothers in the hallway by their lockers. All three of them right next to each other. That’s dangerous. I said a quick hello before Scott or John could say anything, and Zoe could yell at them, and all hell would break loose. Lunch and third hour were the only “classes” that Zoe and I weren’t in together. With a quick good-bye, I headed to lunch till Bobby stopped me.
Bobby Wilson was another friend of mine, almost as old as Zoe. He wasn’t shy, but sure didn’t talk much. And today was no different. He said a quick hello and asked me about my day so far. I told him the norm, but I could tell something was on his mind, but that became irrelevant as I saw him walk by. I concentration on Bobby quickly shattered, and Bobby was left with nothing more than to say goodbye. I felt bad, but Bobby did have to get to class.
Subview High’s cafeteria was a big cafeteria. Rows and rows of food lined one wall of cafeteria, urging kids to eat their fattening, sugar filled goodness. Needless to say, I packed my own lunch. I sat at a table with a bunch of sophomores who I knew but wasn’t entirely friends with. Worked for me. He sat a couple tables over. Such a healthy lunch, he was so perfect so pure, I couldn’t help but be fascinated with him. Who was him? Ha, I was never going to tell. I was even sure Zoe didn’t know. That would be an accomplishment all on it’s own.
I snapped out of this phase when I heard the familiar arguing of Stacie and Troy. I knew both very well, Stacie from childhood and Troy from childhood. Both hadn’t change, still children. There was something different about this argument today though, it looked and sounded official. They were over. They had been dating ever since each knew what dating was. Sadly, they were perfect for each other, but full of themselves and loud. Stacie picked up her things and stormed out of the cafeteria. I apparently had been the only one who noticed the fight. Lucky me.
Troy sat at his table, alone, and actually hadn’t chased after Stacie this time. Now, for the record, I did not like Troy. Far from it, at times, I despised him. We would always get into fights as children. Now, we just avoided each other. But the way he looked, with his head down on the bacteria infested table, made me forget all of that. Without control over myself, I picked up my lunch and moved to his table.
I sat next to Troy, and he didn’t even move his head a little to notice my presence. “She’ll come back. She just has mood swings…every day, not your fault,” I said, trying to sound convincing.
“How do you know that?”
“I don’t. But I guess Stacie is just like that. Evil dressed up in pink with ribbons and bows.” Troy laughed and lifted his head up. There was something different in his eyes I couldn’t explain. He paused, as if seeing me here was a surprise. “Yeah, I guess she was evil, but I’m not the best person either.”
“You’re not evil, just a jerk.”
“Thanks,” he said, putting his head back on the table. I stopped him and made him sit up straight. He put his head up, as if he would fly right out of his seat. “You’re right. This is high school, none of this love crap matters. It’s not real, but what if sometimes, you’re lucky enough so that it is real. How can you tell? You have to take a chance, jerk or not, evil or not. You never know, but you can’t base love or obsession on looks or style. It’s not that easy. You have to see, feel, and breath something different, something special. Stacie wasn’t special. She was just a filler, a period of time that everyone feels. Have something or you have nothing. Life’s weird like that. It sucks, but that’s how life goes. What are you going to do?”
I wanted to tell him he was wrong just because he was Troy, but I stopped. The way he talked, and how he looked, made me think. Maybe he wasn’t that bad of a jerk, maybe that’s how he handled his life. The egoistic Troy had said something plain but beautiful. Life does suck, but that’s exactly what life was.
He walked by the table and stopped to look at us. Troy now had his head again on the table, finished with his speech, and I sat by him as if he was dying, and I was a family visitor. “What’s eating him?” he asked.
“Stacie Rose,” I said.
“Wow, tough break, tell him tennis practice has been canceled for today, ok?”
“Sure.”
“Thanks a lot.” He walked out of the cafeteria and into the parking lot. He was older with money, a driver’s license, and a car. It took me a couple of minutes to realize that he had talked to me. My eyes felt like they were going to pop out of my head. Troy, with his head now up again, noticed. “Don’t be so surprised, tennis practice is always canceled, but I have the feeling that’s not way you’re so red.”
“Are you inferring something?”
“Nope, I don’t infer. I know.”
“Shut up. I don’t even know why I felt sorry for you.” I was going to grab the rest of my lunch and leave, but I didn’t. I sat back down. The way Troy was looking at me, made me actually want to have a conversation with him.
And we did. The whole lunch and then after school, on our way home. Troy lived right next to me…

Flame Thrower a Go Go
Garden. I am in a garden of sorts. Flowers, moving flowers circle me, and I can’t find a way out. Luckily, I have my handy dandy flamethrower parched on my back (the exact flamethrower the fat man up north refused to give me six years ago). I begin to burn to flowers to smithereens. Made them think twice about circling me. I don’t know why, but I want to find the center of this garden. So, a make a run for it to find this center. I find it soon enough.
The center of the garden is flower free and surrounded by tall forest of trees. I turn off my flamethrower, for now. It is rather boring here except I see a small tree on the other side of the center. A bird is sits contently on a branch while a cat watches near by. The cat turns at me and hisses, running into the forest. Everyone’s a critic.
I turn on my flamethrower to burn a path, when two mosquitoes attack. I try to swat them away, but they seem to be getting bigger. Screw this! I run back down the already burnt path and hide behind a bush on the side I had missed. The mosquitoes fly by, and I go back to the center.
Back in the center, curiosity takes over, and I wonder where the heck did that cat go. I’ll teach it to hiss at me. I start burning a path through the forest, in search of the cat. I eventually reach the end of the forest.
The end of the forest is a field of grass. I turn on my flamethrower, convinced it’s safe. I’m in my bare feet, so the grass feels cool, and the wind is refreshing. I am also in my favorite outfit: black tank and baggy cargos. It’s all good. I lay down on the grass and close my eyes. I quickly jump up though, when I smell smoke. Crap.
The forest is now a burning inferno. This wasn’t suppose to happen. My brain aches with all the thoughts and plans rushing through it. I circle around for a place to run, and I see the cat. The cat hisses at me again and runs. I chase the cat and chase the cat, but I never catch the cat…
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I woke up to the sound of something breaking upstairs. My room was in the basement. I don’t mean to brag, but it rocks. I got a futon bed, which I never sleep on, and there was so much metal in my room, it was crazy. I gave any mad scientist a run for her money. I looked at my clock hanging on the wall. 6:15. Crap. I woke up late. I ran into my closet, rummaging through piles of clothes. My black tank top and baggy pants, perfect. I moved to my mirror, out a little gel in my hair and ran up the stairs to yell at the idiot twins.
Sure enough, I found the destruction that was our kitchen. “Hey, you guys! Look at this mess! What would happen if mom and dad came home this very moment in time and saw this?” I shouted, could never tell where they were anyway.
“That’s impossible,” said John, walking into the kitchen.
“Mom and dad are never coming home,” added Scott, also walking into the kitchen. I was never allowed to deal with just one. They knew how to double-team too well. “Don’t say that Scott! Mom and dad could come home.”
“Could being the key word in that sentence.”
“Don’t worry about it squirt. We’ll fix everything after school.” The boys tried to move to the cabinet, but I stepped in the way. “You two ate all the pop tarts yesterday. I get the last one today,” I said defiantly.
Wrong move. A fight erupted and everyone was hitting everyone. Now, I may have been smaller than the idiots, but I was sure enough faster than them. I quickly squirmed out of the dog pile with the pop tart in my mouth. One of the twins had my leg still, but I gained a boost of energy when I heard the doorbell ring. I broke free and dashed to the door. I opened the door and closed it as fast as I could.
Clarissa was at the door, with a cheery morning glow. Morning people weren’t people but robotic aliens trying to take over the world. We talked and all and went to school. Be cool, stay in skool.
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The bell rang and third hour was over. My next class was science so I had to stop at my locker. My locker was next to the idiots, how stupid was that? I tried to open my locker, but it was always jammed. John and Scott arrived and kicked that locker till it had to open. I guess they were useful after all.
Clarissa walked by and we talked again. She left in a hurry though; Scott and John could do that to anyone. I understood. I watched her walk down the hall to lunch. No offence, but I wasn’t really interested in Clarissa. Bobby Wilson was going to make a fool out of himself again. He stopped in the hallway and tried to talk to Clarissa. The fool had had a crush on Clarissa ever since he was born. Some would say it was cute, I say it was pathetic.
Clarissa left and Bobby walked past me down the hall to science class. I ran to catch up him, talk boy. We had to same fourth hour. “Not today, Romeo?” I asked.
“No, not today. Clarissa always seems so preoccupied with something.”
“Yep, she’s preoccupied with something all right.”
“What?”
“Don’t take this personally, Bobby, but I think there’s a guy in school Clarissa’s got her eyes on. And I’m sorry to say, but he’s not you.”
“I knew it.” We made it to class before the bell rang and sat at our usual science table. Today, we were doing a lab, and Bobby and I were partners. The teach’ gave us our supplies, and like magic, I had to lab set up in five minutes flat. I began to mix chemicals. I poured some into the heated beaker.
“Zoe, are you sure you measured the right amount?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, you kinda moved a little fast, and I’m just wondering if this is safe…”
“Of course it’s safe. What do you think will happen?” I spoke too soon, have a knack for it. The chemicals in the beaker began to bubble and pop. Pop all over me. The “explosion” caused burnt holes in my shirt and the teach’ to freak. I was sent to office to call my folks for a new shirt. Call my folks.
Bobby volunteered to take me to the office. I was wondering what the heck he was up to but went along with it. Instead, when we made it out of the classroom, we walked to the girl’s john. Bobby took off his jacket. “Here, put this on over your shirt. The teacher will think you called your parents.”
“Really? Thanks, Bobby,” I said rather quietly.
“No problem, I’ll wait out here.”
“If you wait out here, you’ll get in trouble. Come on, it’s just an ordinary john.” I grabbed Bobby’s hand before he could object. We waited patiently by the paper towel rolls while I took out my tank and put on his jacket. It wasn’t really a jacket but one of those “I didn’t feel let wearing a long sleeve shirt so I put this on” things. The jacket was baggy, but I wasn’t complaining.
I came out of the stall, looking at my tank, “Mine, this was my favorite tank.”
“Why did you wear it today?”
“You ain’t going to believe this Bobby boy, but I had a dream, and I was wearing this. So I thought what the heck, I’ll wear it today.”
“That’s not that weird. I’ve been having weird dreams too. It must be weird dreams day or something.” Bobby and I hid out in the girl’s john till enough time had passed to fool the teach’. We later went back to class. I wanted to thank Bobby again, but I couldn’t. I felt weird about it.
We hung out together after every class and even walked home together. Bobby lived on my street. I totally forgot about Clarissa, but apparently, she forgot about me too. She was walking home with Troy. Now that’s weird. She didn’t see us; we were too far behind her. Bobby and I walked home. Bobby without a jacket, and me with Bobby and his jacket on my mind…


Acrophobia
I am running. Whatever I am running from, I dare not look back. I have absolutely no idea where I am, but I seem to know where to run to. What’s even stranger is that it is dark. I stop as I round a corner to catch my breath. I think I’ve lost him, her, it? I don’t care. I have to get out of here.
The lights turn on, and I figure I’m in a large building. Concrete walls, doors and hallways are sort of a clue. I hear something and swiftly pick a hallway to hide in. A window is at the end of this hallway. Good, at least I can try to figure out more about my location.
I put my face up against the window. Man, I’m high up. Very high up. It’s snowing out, and I feel a chill sprint up my spine. I hear something and turn around. It pushes me, and I crash through the window. I scream as I fall closer and closer to the ground. I black out.
I wake up on the snow-covered ground. I’m alive? How can that be? I see a hand in front of me and take it. I lift myself up and dust the glass of me. No cuts. The person whom the hand belongs to was zoe. Zoe? What are you doing here?
She says nothing and heads toward to building. The building. I was right. I was very high up. Zoe! Come back here! It’s not safe! There’s something in there!
She isn’t going to listen to me. I still follow her though. I feel safe…
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I woke up to the sun shining on my face. I rolled out of bed and got myself ready for school. I grab a t-shirt, a pair of jeans, and my jacket. I better not forget that. Dressed, I head downstairs to have some food. Mom made pancakes; growing boys need a growing breakfast. I ate my food, complimented her, and was out the door. No offence to my mother, the pancakes were good, but everyday did get to me.
Outside, down the sidewalk, a saw Clarissa and Zoe walking to school. I followed behind them, but they didn’t seem to notice. Clarissa was wearing a green shirt that really brought out the color of her brown hair and eyes. Green was her favorite color. It was no wonder. Green was her favorite color; it was now my favorite color.
Without realizing it, school was in view, so I didn’t want to be in view. I blended in a crowd of students and walked a different way to my locker. I’m such a coward.
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The bell rang, and I needed to get to science. I was leaving art class when I saw Clarissa. I held whatever courage I had and talked to her in the hallway. She was on her way to lunch. “Hey, Clarissa.”
“Hey, Bobby. What’s up?”
“Nothing, how about you?”
“Nothing here either.” When Clarissa said this, her head turned a little, like she noticed something.
“Well, see you later Clarissa.”
“Ok, see you Bobby.” I floored it down the hallway. I didn’t get far. Zoe had seen the whole thing. She stopped me in the hall, and we walked to class. She made fun of me for my pathetic ness and clued me in on Clarissa. Apparently, I was out of my league. Nothing new.
In science today, we were having a lab. Zoe and I were partners. Rather have Zoe as a partner than anyone else. At least she knew what she was doing, but she was measuring chemicals sort of fast. I asked her if she knew if this was safe. She gave me her usual answer, but I knew something was wrong. I had a sense for danger. Sure enough, chemicals splattered everywhere. Chemicals even got a Zoe’s favorite tank top. With lightning fast thinking, I volunteered to take Zoe to the office so she could call her parents. Zoe’s parents weren’t home; I didn’t want Zoe to be embarrassed by explaining her parents to the teacher. She didn’t need to explain her family to anyone.
I took her to the girl’s bathroom and told her to put on my jacket instead. This would make it seem like she called her parents after all. She pulled me into bathroom with her! There were no girls in it though, so I was spared being screamed at. Zoe put on the jacket and amazingly, thanked me.
She seemed embarrassed, but there was no way I was going to tell her that. We hung out the whole day and even walked home together. We walked behind Clarissa and Troy home, but I didn’t mind. I had someone else walking me home…_________________________________________________

Circle of Masks
I am in this vast place again. I see my reflection in the water’s ripples. I still have my mask, but a trail of blood drips down the right side. Funny, I’m not in pain.
I see the tree, and I see the dancing masks. This time, they do not fade away. There are four of us now. We all dance around the tree. A circle of masks, dancing around the tree, never broken yet never truly free.