\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/andys25
Review Requests: OFF
1 Public Reviews Given
1 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by AndyS2510 Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.5)
A good start to what could turn into a great story, I won't mention any grammar issues, but I will point out a plot hole. The shop keeper who would not hand over the CCTV, if you are going to continue you need to look up Police procedure. All she needed to do is get a warrant for the footage, that is the procedure she would follow. You could even have her put the frightners on the owner, saying he must have something to hide. I would also change the business, if he has sensitive clientele his shop would be more than a corner shop. Hope this was helpful.


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
1 Reviews · *Magnify*
Page of 1 · 25 per page   < >
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/andys25