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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/angelahaex
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3 Public Reviews Given
3 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
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Review of The Stranger  Open in new Window.
Review by angelahaex Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
This might sound a bit strange, but I like the length of your sentences. They're a tad long but you packed them with so much detail that it makes your short story (beginning of a longer one) that much more interesting. The only critique I have is that this sentence: "It was all she could do to restrain herself on the groaning, weather beaten bench that was one of many lining the pond that curved its way through the park". sounds a strange when you read it aloud. I don't know if it's the placement of the commas or selection of detail but I think if you just rearrange it or maybe even make it two sentences, it would flow much more nicely. Overall, it's a good start and I'm curious to see where this story leads.
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Review of House of Wax  Open in new Window.
Review by angelahaex Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
This was really interesting. I liked how you gave the characters each their own voice and really established them to the reader. The setting was placed well and you have a good way of expressing yourself even through your writing.
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