Hi! I just wanted to say, first of all, I loved the overall story concept - definitely different! (I'm a huge fan of different lol). I liked how each character didn't already have talents ( like "freak shows" in circuses) but had to learn/ were given talents and things to do.
One thing I noticed was that there were a few places that either needed some punctuation or needed different punctuation. For example, " She follows the smell in the distance a Fairy smiles for it has lured her into a fairy ring". Maybe could use a period after " distance". There were a few spots like that, but honestly other than the few spacing/ pausing issues, this was very well written, and I hope you continue the story so we can find out what happens next with her show! :)
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.07 seconds at 4:48pm on Dec 22, 2024 via server WEBX1.