There was very little to 'Ponder' when I gave you this mark. It-your dissatation-amused me and gave me a laugh at times, something that not many writers are capable of doing. A talent that shall be seen on more frequent visits.
I once worked on a construction site were we had a nutter who would throw 1 inch bolts up into the air, telling everyone to remove their safty helmets.
Needless to say, he spent an allful lot of time in hospital.
Good stuff;
Johnny_mac
You're a talent Megan that was bound for greater recognition, and now you have been found. I shall look forward to the delights of your first novel. And, going by the entertainment I have received fron 'Queen Nessie' this will not be the last novel you will write.
Water always finds its own level, as does talent, welcome 'Author' to the serious world of literture.
Lots-O-Love;
Johnny
Promises, Sheree, are something that we take for granted. Then, when they don't eventuate, we cry foul. I have never sent my wife a Valentine card, as I love her every day not just one.
Was there a reason for changing your stanza? I found your poem funny, I hope this was how you expected it to be received. You write well and I will visit again. I also gave your folder some clothes.
Love:Johnny
Glen Campbell eh. You dark horse you, Megan. You seem to have fitted everything into your story so easily.
Which, in a short-short story, takes a certain amout of ability. But then that is what you have in abundance, Megan.
Lots-0-Love;
Johnny
Angel and Megan: I have never been a religious person, even though I was baptised and went to a Catholic school. But this doesen't deter me from thanking you for the read that has alluded me for nye on 60 years.
Lots-0-Love;
Johnny
You give a glimpse of the reasons and actions, that make a writer continue when others fall by the wayside.
Best of luck Megan, keep writing.
Lots-0-Love,
Johnny
I'm not American so only ypu can speak for them. On a broader front, world wide Beurocrasy has gone mad. At our local rubbish dump there were 26 signs, instructing visitors of what they could and couldn't do.
I remember Billy Connally the scottish comedian saying 'that he'd spotted a sign high up on top of a post, in New York, insructing the direction to the blind school.
He wondered how the blind were supposed to read it when it was so high off the ground?"
Love,
Johnny
Words cause us to grow, for the better I'm not that sure. Dreams are what we are, without them how banel our lives would be. The important part of dreams is to live them, and a child can be the saving grace in this endevour. You have talent, but try to organise your thoughts as you write.
Love,
Johnny
The point is self evident in the title, notwithstanding that the content once again is there but as you quite rightly point out it needs your loving care and hands to make it even better.
By the way, second last stanza, second line:
A mothers love means so much,
It comes deep from with (? )something missing.
Love,
Johnny
Love of a child can never be surpassed by the mundane things in life. Children are children only once, and not to make the most of that time would be a sin.
The words are all there, the presentation needs a little sprucing up. But all in all very good.
Johnny
Full of feeling, that, we could never doubt. A fine tribute to a family member. You must see your brother quite a lot, I haven't seen mine in 40yrs, sad really.
Johnny
It already has, as you've written the answer down for us. Stuff the rain you say because of its fickle nature. When you walk in the rain you get wet, and that's it, it's only water after all.
Not very romantic I agree, but nearer the truth of living.
Johnny
Have you ever been lonely, have you ever been blue. Have you ever met someone, that took the piss out of you.
Partly from a song the rest is original. Strangely, seeing that I'm an old guy, I liked it.
Johnny
It's nice to be so sure of something intangible. But then you can put forward that a supreme being can never be an intangible. God is all things to all people, for some it is salvation, for others damnation. And although your own beliefs show through, try not being too judgmental on those that don't agree.
Johnny
A haven that could only promote a feeling of belonging. The myriad colours of the rainbow aren't needed there, as you construct your own coloured world.
Peaceful yet very alive, solitude yet buzzing with varients. A vision of paradise given to few, yet you let us in for a few brief moments. Thank you.
Johnny
Very good concept as you identify the real sorrow of your chosen prose. The content, as I say, is strong and pertinent. Should you part your work though into a number of stanzas, then perhaps the full impact of the words could be seen. Just a suggestion from the old guy.
You have talent, make up your own mind as to the best layout of your work.
Johnny
Compared to some of the sorrowful tales I've read from time to time, this is a classical piece of prose. It should, in all honesty, be placed alongside of a plaque heralding it as the home for the inspirational.
Johnny
P.S. Engagement complete, well done that person there.
The words are nearly all there but I thought it seemed a little higgilty pigguity. I've done an edit to try and give your words more weight, if you don't like it that's fine, as it is your poem. Just trying to help.
Johnny
Megan, what a lovely story. All those dolls that you love, and somehow I got in there as well, how good is that.
Imagination takes different people different ways. Yours does the same as mine and dives off the high diving board. No point settling for half a story when with a little bit of magic you can have a great story.
And yours is a great story Megan, look forward to the next one. I'm pushy aren't I hehehe.
Lots-0-Love Megan,
Johnny
Can you come around to my place, I'm sure there must be heaps of loot around here somewhere. You write in an interesting way, and you had my attention for the whole essay. This is not to be scoffed at as this is something of a miracle the first time I do a reading.
That's what storytelling is all about, painting pictures for the mind.
Johnny
Great wording, is this played heavy rock? I was going to wish you all the best you wish for yourselves. Knock em dead lady, and I will still be cheering well after the last notes have floated away.
I don't know how to say this at this late stage, but.
The last line of the first stanza:
'I noticed it the first time I looked (in) your eyes.'
I just though 'into' may flow better!
Just a thought Laurie.
Lots-0-Love,
Johnny.
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