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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/cale_fast
Review Requests: OFF
14 Public Reviews Given
14 Total Reviews Given
Review Style
Hello! I like to think I'm pretty good at reviewing. I look closely at grammar and spelling mistakes. I also look to see if the idea is original or kind of just a copy of something I've read a million times. I am going to be honest but nice, and if your writing is good, I'll even throw some GP your way! Maybe....
I'm good at...
-Finding spelling mistakes -Finding grammar errors -Good idea or no? -ORIGINAL IDEA? -Effort level
Favorite Genres
-Drama -Nitty Gritty Action -Something Dark -Romance -Adventure -Bloody -Poems
Least Favorite Genres
I mean, poems are alright and I'll read it. I just don't normally read poems, so make sure yours is extra-special (:
Favorite Item Types
ANY! Books though mostly.
Least Favorite Item Types
NONE!!!
I will not review...
I'll review it all y'all! (:
Public Reviews
1
1
Review by Cale Fast Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)

Raj,


I will begin this review by telling you why I enjoyed this piece of writing. First of all, it's interesting. I like how you tied the whole black magic thing into the mix and that was your overall theme. However, I have many, many concerns to follow and I hope you will change what I am about to tell you because I believe it will definitely take your writing to the next level.

Things To Fix:

Why all the words that start with n? I mean, I totally get your trying to be original and everything, but just why? Personally, all the N's do is confuse me. They make me have to re-read because I had no idea what they meant, and I absolutely hate re-reading. Especially when it could be avoided! Maybe in your next piece try not to use words with the same letter? It makes it seem repetitive and actually a tad bit annoying.

I happened to notice a few spelling mistakes. Firstly, "they became the ne plus ultra in the science of black magic." This makes no sense. What does ne mean? Maybe you meant to have another word there, but see what I mean by having all the N's? You may have even confused yourself.

"Then came; a man, whose hobby was numismatics." This underlined mistake is an easy fix. Just take out the semi-colon so it flows like this, " Then came a man, whose hobby was numismatics.

The final issue I had for this story was the big words. Huge words. I understand (again) that you wanted them to add a whole next-level, but I believe they are incredibly unnecessary because all the big words start with N!

You have a great idea here. Seriously. You can really do something with the whole black magic thing. However, there are some things that I believe if you fixed like I told you, it would really make your story so much better. I hope I wasn't to rough, I was just providing some constructive-criticism. That is, after-all, what you paid me for.

Grammar Check: B

Spelling Check: B

Originality: A

Effort: A+ (took a lot of time to find those huge words, I can tell!)


Keep writing and you will spread your wings and take flight! *Helicopter*

-Caleb Fast
*Cool*





*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
2
2
Review of The Cat  Open in new Window.
Review by Cale Fast Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (3.5)


Very interesting poem. I really enjoyed how at first you made the cat seem like just an ordinary pet, but after you realize it belongs to the witch! This was very unique and interesting! I also enjoyed the general dark tone the poem has after just about 6 lines. My favorite part of the poem was the ending, how the witch's cackle is a lullaby to the cat. Very unique. *Laugh*

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-Grammar Check: A+

-Spelling Check: A+

-Originality: B (sounds like many Halloween poems for children.)

-Effort: A (Good flow.)

I believe you will truly break the chains that writing can have with a better topic. Try something more serious next time. It will pay off.

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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
3
3
Review of Invisible  Open in new Window.
Review by Cale Fast Author IconMail Icon
Rated: ASR | N/A (Review only item.)


This is a very powerful piece of writing! I really, really enjoyed how truly sad you seem to be. However, I believe that part of why this is so good is because you derive it from personal events. Maybe a past relationship, maybe a current one. However, I really enjoyed it. You even had proper punctuation (thank god.)

Grammar Check: A+

Spelling Check: A+

Originality: A+

Effort: A+ (seemed very genuine.)

Awesome job! *Laugh*



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*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
4
4
Review by Cale Fast Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Very dark and twisty but I like that! I loved this piece. However, it would be much better with proper punctuation, meaning commas at the end of every thought. I like the progressive breakdown of the fictional character, and how it's not all at once. You can almost imagine it in your head. Excellent job!

Grammar Check: B

Spelling Check: A+

Originality: A+ (very original and well thought out.)

Effort: A (I'd like to see an even longer poem on the same topic!)

Great job!


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
5
5
Review of One Mis-Step  Open in new Window.
Review by Cale Fast Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (3.0)
Cheri,

Interesting and funny! I had a bit of a laugh reading this however I did notice a grammar mistake. "Get a scissors," should be, "Get me scissors," or something along these lines.

Grammar Check: B (some things were capitalized that shouldn't be capitalized.)

Originality: B+

Spelling Check: A

Effort Level: C (I think if you put your mind to it you can definitely get a bit of a better topic.

Keep writing! You will improve.

-Cale


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!Open in new Window..
6
6
Review by Cale Fast Author IconMail Icon
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
James,

This a a very special piece of writing. Not only is it original (something big I look at as a reviewer) but it throws some very intense themes in. Death. Sacrifice. Pain. My favorite part I think was how all those men sacrificed life for one life that they weren't even sure existed! I mean, he could've been dead in the waves. This brings me to my next point. The Old Man.

I have some questions. Does the Old Man represent a conscience, or a higher power? Was the main character praying to him for help when he was calling out? I found this somewhat confusing. Also, what did Tierno do to our main character that caused him blinding pain? These two things were somewhat confusing and distracting from the overall story.

Something else I didn't quite like was how the main character saved the First Mate. I mean, let's be honest, if the CPR didn't work, how is smacking him going to? Everything about the story seemed very realistic, except this part. I honestly think that if the First Mate died, it would have adding even more darkness and sacrifice to your story, which I definitely would have appreciated!

Spelling Check: A+ (big words were good oh my!)

Grammar Check: A++

Originality: A+++ (never read anything like it)

Overall, excellent, excellent story. I think you deserve the five stars. You tied everything so well together. I absolutely loved the big words. I loved the characters. I loved the dark and sometimes stomach upsetting graphic scenes. It was amazing! You fix those few confusing parts, and you good sir will have one hell of a story! Fantastic job my friend! It was my absolute pleasure to read.

-Caleb Fast
7
7
Review of Life Speaks  Open in new Window.
Review by Cale Fast Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
Dear Jenny,

I really enjoyed this poem. I believe that it was well balanced and full of meaning. I actually think it is one of the best pieces of poetry I have ever read! Spelling Check: A+ Grammar Check: A+ Originality: A+ Lots of poems these days are about love, but I believe that because you tied family and healing into the mix, the originality score was definitely an A. Keep writing, you will improve!

Caleb
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