This is an interesting idea and story. I enjoyed the mixing of our everyday concerns and relationships with a fairy tale.
I think the names of the King and Queen are wonderful. I laughed and nodded my head when I read about I Dont Know and I Dont Care. Great idea. There is alot of potential with just these two creations. I think they resonate with us.
I had a bit of trouble focusing in and relating to the story of the unreal people and the various tasks they must undergo to meet the king and Queen. I want to know a bit more about the Unreal people and why there is so much sadness.
I think there is alot here with the emotional experience in a kingdom and I would ejoy reading more about how the king and queen became I dont Know and I Dont Care and how the people became unreal and why the rain of sadness was so complete.
Thank you for writing this and for letting me review. Good luck
This is an interesting piece. Depression is an important and delicate reality that you captured in a new way with the news report as if the depression were a Tornado about to rip through the town, or the person.
I enjoyed the news reporter style more and more as I reread the poem. It works well as storm analogy. Thats a unique idea.
Specifically the way you use the word and statement "Im Live" contrasted with the death and darkness that depression can bring. Also the way the sufferer is advised to hold on to something tight and another person if possible. I think depression can be very isolating and this human connection can help pull one out and back towards life.
Thank you for this and for letting me review my first work. Good luck
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