Overall, it has a very mysterious arcane feel to it with how the two characters interact with each other. I also find it interesting how it's set in the year 1980 and is told in the third person perspective to show a broader view of the characters' thoughts and display. However, it might have been even better if the story was introduced with more descriptions of the setting and letting the readers guess through the details (just to give more impact). For example, giving a more vivid image of the nursing home in which Robert Smith was in by describing the smell, scene, or items can be some. The dialogues were very smooth and easy to follow, but perhaps a little too left alone on its own. In between conversations, you can add about the person's eyes, what the person is doing, where the person is looking, or even just their manner of speaking. "I really dont know what you are talking about Mary," Robert said feigning ignorance hoping this girl would just drop the subject altogether, but she wasnt having it. Just to add more suspense regarding Mary's unexpected discovery, you can elaborate more of Robert's fear and anxiety of being exposed. (E.g. describe how his heart was beating faster or cold sweat started forming or his complexion was paling). Im looking forward to the next chapter! (if it is to be continued).
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