A real detective story. I enjoyed it a lot. From the moment the friend present the idea of going for a vacation until the murder is solved you have caught my attention with the plot development and the characters. Actually speaking it's 12 noon in my country and I am still reading your story without preparing my lunch.(only me and my husband at home. My son has gone a trip. So it will be a simple meal.)IT'S VERY INTERESTING AND i HOPE TO READ MORE OF YOU.
I like your poem. It painted a picture of red apples lying on the ground , dusty and bruised as the poet says not noticed by any one : a tasty fruit. It's like listening to a story and we see the shady tree with our own eyes. Word choice is excellent and the specific end rhyme suits the poem.The nature gives us bountiful but we tend to ignore.
I like this poem very much.One reason is I can relate his work because his autobiography"Along walk to freedom' is included in our school syllabus.I have read about him and I admire the person very much.So your poem is a great tribute to a great person. I like the lines
'The dreams
that birthed a land'. It says all.It's a very impressive poem.
I got your feeling of winter though I have never experienced winter.I live in tropics but I like the way you let us feel the winter. The poet dislikes winter and the use of words such as'addicted','withers', and 'shiver ' show it.The cold is spread even to humans and people are distanced in winter. I like your expressions on winter.
Very high flown piece of poetry. It seems you know Shakespearean poetry well.I enjoyed your poem and I think you are trying to discuss the current problems in your country. .It gives a strong message and I like the use of words in your poem.
A strong declaration of love.Typical of lovers. When I read your poem my mind went back to the time i loved. How many of those promises are fulfilled is another matter. I like your poem. Keep writing.
The old friendships are never forgotten even when you don't meet them any more. You have used a beautiful simile to compare friendship.The rich, warm quality of a raindrop in the Summer reminds of our past friends.While you are busy with your life you temporarily forget them to be reminded about them again as in a sudden rain The simile is continued to the end of the poem to tell us about our friends.The theme is nicely crafted and you can improve more with practice.
An unusual theme to deal with. Your love of words is nicely described here. I am not a native writer so I can be wrong but I don't understand the words'dust motes spin'.You have included a nice metaphor-
'A whisper of yesterday
takes a breath.'
I can see that you are trying to tell the power of words on paper and your attempt is successful. I can't understand the line
'that-which-would-be-forgotten
on today.'
The troubled and challenging life of a girl is described here. The girl tries to find the life which her father has shown her. The father-daughter relationship is very close.'he said he'd call me "daughter", but treat me as a friend.'
The couplets make the poem a narrative, something easy to understand.
The lines give the rhythm of the sea which the girl is associated with. She compares her life to a rough ridden sea where you have to be accurate , and precise when taking decisions.
You made me feel a sorrow of a mother losing her child. It is indescribable for a mother to lose a child of her own. All the others in the family get used to the idea of the death but for a mother it is never so.Here the poet shows us the mother's attempt to come to terms with the death of the child, but she can't.She is highly worried and contemplates on it in her long periods of silence.The grief is presented very emotionally. A well composed poem. Good luck with your writing.
Very interesting. The writer has crafted the story with a twist to it. The title suggests something ordinary; a birthday of an old lady but when the story develops we can see that it has turned into a murder. I don't know why some lines are written only half way through. For me it ruins the pleasure of reading through the story.The writer was clever to turn a simple, ordinary story into an imaginative one.
Yes. I agree. Christmas is a time of sharing and caring. but very few take it to heart during the Christmas season. They engage in things which they used to do in the past seasons and nobody is concerned about less privileged people in the world.The poet makes us feel the suffering of children in this world. When people have a chance to do good to their neighbors they just ignore them and the Christmas is just another celebration.The poet discusses the negligence of the parents here. They don't care about their children because of their addiction to liquor. T he poem is a pathetic plea from a child who mocks the world about it's generosity.
A poem on compassion and generosity.It is very moving. The dog finally finds a place to live and I am happy because the poem ends with a positive thought. You have inspired us through your poem in this Christmas season.I like the message it conveys and I wish that I too can write like you.
It's very heart rending. I have read so many stories where people keep silent for injustice. but for me, I can never stand it. I am a matured matron and whenever I see injustice I am strong enough to protest and see that the justice is done.So I feel very sorry for boy and I feel his helplessness and despair for the agony that he is going through. Very very interesting work.
Yes. Grow up and learn. That's how it is going to be! The people follow the fame and popularity whether it is gained by good or bad deeds.WE SHOULDN'T FEEL DEPRESSED FOR THOSE LESSER BEINGS.
This piece of of writing opens our eyes to the actual horror of nuclear explosions taking place in the world. After some time people forget about these terrible tragedies and only those who suffer will remain forever scarred. They have no future and who is going to give them their happiness back? The writer is raising a serious question which we have been avoiding so far. Very effective writing and it makes me scary to think about Emily.What a wonderful world?
Yes. Tt is true.I too have experienced defeat and it's very humiliating. You never forget it and it bites you day and night until you do some thing about it. You have expressed what is in my mind. but the last two lines are not clear to me.
I feel your grief. The hurt is expressed emotionally.You are disappointed with your wife but wait for the sake of your children. Here I am. I have given you a review. Nevertheless you can't expect all your items to be reviewed because this is a vast web site and some times you need luck to have all your writing to be reviewed and people expect the same from you.
It's a nice poem. Giving reasons for being with her. You show through your poem that you care for her more than anything else in the world. Poet is even ready to go to hell to be with her. The rating went from 4.5 to 4 because there were some spelling mistakes which could be avoided. but I like it very much. Good luck with your writing.
Very moving poem. I n a very few words you describe all your feelings about the person in your mind. it's A SIMPLE DICTION AND WORDS ARE HIGHLY ECONOMICAL.The length of the lines indicate your varying feelings and the poem is full of inference. Especially the last line gives out a very positive feeling and radiates happiness in your heart.
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