Bravah! This is a rare piece of literary excellence that can make me chuckle. While there is no real plot, and very little in the way of a story, the events that you describe are so wonderfully poignant that anyone can empathize with the protagonist. The anecdote about locking the passanger side door was particularly hilarious.
As someone who is constantly disapointed by the quality of online poets, you have truly impressed me. This sonnet was well-written and carried an inspirational message. The thought of "born anew each day" and waking up with a blank slate is a wonderful philosophy, and you have captured it eloquently in this piece. And, much to my delight, your structure was spot on--huzzah for iambic pentameter!
Humorously enough, I fully intend to run for the White House in a little over two decades from now. I may have to initiate another Civil War if Ms. Spears or Ms. Jackson were ever elected to any echelon of public office.
Homer Simpson would cater to the television viewers (free publicity with every show), Larry the Cable Guy would garner the Southern vote, and Air Bud would procure the support of the canine populaiton--of course, dogs cannot vote (some obscure law from the eighteenth century about opposable thumbs and being human). It looks like I will be facing Jack Black in my election campaign.
I think that this story works because of the originality of the premise. It was definitely creative, humorous, and (if one reads it from a certain frame of mind) philosophically and emotionally deep. There is a conflict between relaxation and responsibility that held particular sway over me. It was also enjoyable to determine the identity of the protagonist--I guessed at it from the start, but I was impressed that you did not succumb to the irrational desire to give a definite confirmation.
As a fan of science fiction, fantasy, and subsequent essays thereof, I enjoyed your writing. You had some excellent contrasts and comparisons between fantasy and science fiction. I am actually in the process of(or rather, I am waiting for ample motivation, at which point I will begin) writing a novella/novel that combines fantasy with science fiction.
The only aspect of this piece that could be improved was your ending. It halted very abruptly, and a more thorough conclusion would tie up your essay nicely.
This piece made me smile--it was random, of course, but in a pleasantly unique way. We could actually delve into some philosophy about your "always there to hold the other up" argument, which was actually quite touching in its own way.
As a piece of literature, it was good. You had an excellent level of repetition, which kept a smooth flow and consistency.
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/deer2028
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.07 seconds at 4:25pm on Dec 26, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
