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Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/dietrying23
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4 Public Reviews Given
4 Total Reviews Given
Public Reviews
1
1
Review of Someday  Open in new Window.
Review by Ellen Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
I liked the secion was were you talked about your writing goals. It reminded me of someting I would write down. The best thing about this poem is a lot of people can relate ot it and it isn't just goals that you would want. I laughed at the part about the mango but it did seem a tad random. My favorite line was
" Someday
I'm going to leave the city
Look up to see the stars at night
And smile"
I felt there was some symbolism in there as well not just the literal.
There were a couple of staces that could have flowed better like Stance 4 but overall good job/
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Review of Quiet  Open in new Window.
Review by Ellen Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (5.0)
I love this and can relate to every line! Everything in this poem flows nicely and your word choices were spot on. Maybe I'm a little biased because this sounds so much like me and what I'm dealing with but I think this great. Keep writing because at least for me it helps deal with the shyness.
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Review of maybe today  Open in new Window.
Review by Ellen Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.5)
My favorite lines of this are "we will turn off the telvision and pick up a good book to read" "We will praise a child for te good he or she has done". This poem made me smile because it was so filled of hope when thers sp little of it. The only thing I hav to suggest is certain lines seemed a liitle wordy like "pick up a good bok to read" could jst be shortened to pick up book. With poetry its all about word flow. Overall though this was enjoyable to read.
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