This was a blast of flavor in the eyes, my friend. The introductory paragraph is weak and cliched, but the rest of it is strong and original. Please keep writing.
Happy Holidays,
Gabriel S. New
$ilky $mooth $tories
www.gabrielsnew.tk
I like the feeling or the expression, it's not worth my time to pry the two apart and that's a trait of good emotional writing. I hesitate to inflate your ego further, but I look forward to reading more from you.
Happy Holidays,
Gabriel S. New
$ilky $mooth $tories
www.gabrielsnew.tk
I didn't have time to read this whole thing, but I dig the intro, it reads kind of like Ursula K. LeGuin or J.K. Rowling except a little more amateur. Work on polishing your style and gripping the reader with an open hand, perhaps by using fewer and stronger/more peculiar descriptive words.
And above all, keep writing my friend.
Gabriel S. New
www.gabrielsnew.tk
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