Arriving home to find my girlfriend had left me, taking all my money, I drove my car to the nearest cliff, but as I drove off into space my cell phone left a message saying, "if you pick me up at the office you can drive me to the bank, we just won the lottery."
Dear Dean
EXTREMELY EFFECTIVE AND HEART WRENCHING . I don’t even think that is a word but boy oh boy is my gut going wow I did not see that coming. That is so amazing and I think that it is great but you should change it up and make it more like a poem like this:
Arriving home to find my girlfriend had left me
, taking all my money
, I drove my car to the nearest cliff
, but as I drove off
into space
my cell phone left a message saying,
"if you pick me up at the office you can drive me to the bank,
we just won the lottery."
good job
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/georgekarley
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.06 seconds at 7:39pm on Nov 05, 2024 via server WEBX1.