thank you so much, i just logged in to get ready to print out my writings cause i thought i would loose them when membership expired, thanks so much, what a great surprise!!!!
Very emotional and beautiful writing. Flowed together very nicely. I found no errors in your writing either. I think you did a good job telling the story of thoughts in nice structured verses. All together a good poem and i gave it 5 stars. Keep it up.
Simple, beautiful, nice flow, no errors, overall pretty good. Short and simple, yet emotional and tragic also. I like the references in the poem not straight up stating the meaning, but still understandable by a knowledged reader. Nice piece. Keep it up.
I thought this was well put together and organized, the flow is not my style, but i still have appreciation for it. I found no errors on spelling, punc, grammer, or capitilization. Overall, i think it's very good. I also understand it from the way it was written also.
Very nicely written. I can't really comment on the wording or togetherness of this poem becauwe it's your thoughts, but I can suggest that you capitilize your I's. I did feel the emotion of the writing though and can feel what you feel in the moment of reading your entry.
Wonderfully written. Such honesty is behind this poem. I found no errors in your writing and think you did a good job going through the phases of a marriage bound to fail. I also like the way you stated the same thing in each verse, yet changed the purpose of what was happening.
This is very emotional and heartful. You take us on a journey of your marriage in a short poem. I found no errors in your writing, and think you did a wonderful job with the flow of the poem and the order of the wording. The verses come together nicely.
These are beautiful, and I think it's greats that you wrote them yourself. So many people go with traditional when traditional is not the vows they keep. I know you will cherish them dearly forever. I will not comment on anything because this is your words and meant to sound how you want them to. thanks.
I love the way this poem was written. I found some capitilization errors, unless the "I" was meant to be short. I did notice the Y was capitilized on purpose though. other than that, nicely written. i was able to follow the story and get the twist at the end of it.
You raise a wonderful, important question. And I raise this one: If it was the law to keep your vows, would there be more peace and successful marriages, or more people in jail? Lol. Actually not trying to be funny, just saying. People now a days have no respect for each other. My ex-husband beat me for 8 years, violently, fearfully. I was able to finally leave, but after damage had been done. And the traditional vows is what he told me on our wedding day. I kept mine, what happened to his??
I think this is a lovely poem, written so touchingly. I found no errors in spelling, grammer, puncuation, or capitilization either. I like the way the story is told of a tragic event through the childs eyes. So much emotion is put behind it. Again, beautiful.
I like this one very much. Longing for a love that hasn't come yet, but you keep on trying knowing that it will. I found no errors in spelling, grammer, capitilization, or puncuation either. Very well put together and flow is nice through most of the poem. The first through third verses seemed a little off, but I was able to interpret.
I love how you told this story from beginning to end in just a few verses. I am a victim of domestic violence also and did the exact same thing. people dont realize why we stay. The begininning showing you have hope it'll change, 2nd verse shows it didn't, 3rd questioning why you keep trying, them not understanding, and 4th realizing it wont change and moving on. Very beautiful.
I think this is beautifully written. I am a domestic violence survivor myself and really got caught in this poem. I can see who she used to be, who he made her, and who she turned into. Telling it in this point of view also makes it very strong. Please also review my work, as alot of them have to do with this topic. Thanks, and again, nice work.
Beautiful, beautiful, I love it. So powerful and emotional. I have several pieces you might enjoy also on the same outline: pretending to be okay and being strong even though we are breaking down inside. Please read and review my portfolio also. Again, nice work, I found no errors in your piece and was put together well. Thanks.
Nicely written. I have found no errors with your spelling, your puncuation, or your grammer. Capitilization looks to be correct also. The story comes together well and leaves no questioning as to what is going on. Very good job and please also review my work, Mother We Love You, and 8 Years, Wasted or Worth It? thank you and again, nice job.
I love the way you have written this piece in such secret meaning. I am a victim of domestic violence also and understand every word and refrence in your piece. It's very emotional and full of powerful phrases and such. Please check out my writings, "8 years, wasted or worth it," and "Mother we love you" thanks again and nice job.
Awesome song. I wish I could of told him that a long long time ago. This has lots of power and stregnth behind it. Even when you refer to him moving on and hoping the next woman does the right thng also. I really like it. I can relate to it myfelf, being a victim of domestic violence for 8 years. Nice work.
I tottally understand this. I have two children and just left my husband in Jan 2010. It's been hell for me to get back on my feet due to the way the goverment works. I make like a buck too much for any kind of asssistance, the father got away with all sorts of things. Thanks for posting this. My entire portfolio is based on my experiances through this. Please read, 8 years: wasted or worth it? if you get a chance. and "Mother We Love You" also. Also, feel free to join my domestic violence group. I want to help others also. thanks, and it was a nice piece.
Nicely written, good flow, and everything comes together in the end. I do like it alot. It reminds me of something I have written my notebook also: It's ok if I'm wrong, if we never made mistakes, we'd never learn...It's okay if I loose, if I never lost, then I could never look forward to winning...I don't expect anything, therefore I can never be dissapointed, only surprised...just something I jotted down one day. thanks again for reviewing my work and having me read this. Take care.
wonderfully written, please review my short story, 8 years, wasted or worth it. and also if you wish, join my group for domestic violence. thanks again.
very beautiful, no errors, great wording, awesome. please read and review my short story- 8 years, wasted or worth it- and join my domestic violence group. thanks.
Wow. So short and simple but i feel the relief she feels. I was abused for 8 years, and the first thing I did when I left him was put on make up, cut my hair, put the TV on the channel I wanted, etc. Please join my domestic abuse group and read and review my short story- 8 years, wasted or worth it. thanks again.
i really like this one, wether it is a poem or story, it is written well. i found no errors in it also. please join my domestic violence group and read and review my short story. 8 years: wasted or worth it. again, nice job on the writing. thanks
Printed from https://shop.writing.com/main/profile/reviews/georgia3281011
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.08 seconds at 2:33pm on Nov 25, 2024 via server WEBX1.