You got a lot of information into 6 sentences! It told the story, incorporating what was required nicely. I especially like the last sentence. It had a good flow. Very nice writing.
I enjoy the first person narrative. It was an easy read, no stumbling blocks to distract from the action. It was very well presented, and didn't seem like it was over 900 words! I wondered why this person didn't show concern over his buddy who dropped off the mountain, but other than that (it was a non event)didn't take away from the task at hand, climbing higher. Very good job. Thanks for the read.
I was waiting for more! The simple element of kindness of the round individual is clear and uncomplicated. It's fresh and I enjoyed the read. Not at all what I expected, with the description of the winged one, I waited for something dark. An unexpected surprise! Thank you.
Wow! I don't know what to say! I felt sorry for the poor guy, so confused and questioning everything. Things changed so quickly that at first I thought, wait, what am I missing? But as I kept reading, it evolved into a surrealistic dream, or nightmare. This goes along the lines of Twin Peaks, so many strange things that upon second look are normal at the moment. I liked the off beat adventure, even though the first couple of paragraphs I wasn't quite sure, but it is unique and on the most part well constructed. I spotted a couple of typos or maybe a faux pas in present tense vs. past, otherwise very good.
I like poetry that tells a tale and this one has a rhythm, and actually rhymes on the most part. It's a nice portrayal of today's life, but then in the end there's that little twist of levity. Good turn around, it lightens up a dark subject.
Hmm, the sentiment is graceful and conveys the message of love, but, and I'm sorry to say that, to me, this is not what I would categorize as poetry. I can see it in a letter or greeting card. I am no judge of what is called poetry that has no rhyme, no beat to it. I do admire the sentiment and how it is put forth in this writing.
Cute, great play between the wife and husband. I'm sure you've heard this before, but it's very imaginative making lite of Sleepy Hollow and bringing Poe into it. Funny! The patter is fairly good, it runs fairly smoothly, but I like the way you've conveyed conversation amidst the story of Ichabod.
This is actually beautiful. It would make a great introduction to this story of love and longing. If it's meant to be poetry, I'm not a good judge of poetry that doesn't have some rhyme to it, but as a taste of what's to come in a book, it's fascinating. It hints at long lost love, time travel, the mysteries and power of love. Good job!
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