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Review by Gurtax Author IconMail Icon
Rated: E | (4.0)
Greetings Krystxn! You reviewed one of my texts so i thought i would return the favor =)

A good short story!

I'v got some comments and suggestions tho =)

In the lines:
“I will.” Came a quiet voice. The people of the village turned to look at the speaker at the back of the crowd. “I will face the creature of shadows.” The young man said boldly.

I suggest moving the young man to before the second time he speaks. In the current way i think the The of the young man stings the eye...

maby you should think shortening the fight or otherwise increase the intensity of it.

I dont get the glowing eyes part... what is it suppose to emphasize?
Mayby add that it signifies somekind prelude to an specific attack?
just a suggestion

I especially like the *there was a single black tooth*
it hints that maby the monster isnt truly destroyed....


hope this help you some =)

/gustav
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