You sound like me, I love to people watch and ponder about their lives, what they are there for/doing, etc. Maybe it is just a writer quality, seems like a lot of us love to people watch and eavesdrop and weave fantasies about everyday interactions. Now I really want a mall pretzel.
Now you made me want some soup haha. I like my soup with some good quality buttered bread, preferably a bit ryeish. Ok, back to the poem, I think my favorite lines were "sucking the goodness from bones" because it conveys such a clear picture that I can hear as well in my mind, and I like the little bit of alliteration at the end with "savory, spicy, garden vegetable." Definitely a feel-good, warm, and cozy poem, with a bit of a shiver induced by the bones lines.
Beautifully written and flows melodically. I've always had a special affinity for trees. It does amaze me how they can be dead and still large and looming for long after. Of course, you do have to be wary of them falling on your house or car if they are nearby haha.
Aw, sweet and full of young love's yearning. I hope you find that special relationship you seek, if not with that person, then with another. I didn't see any errors that stood out and it was enjoyable reading :)
Haha, I think the best part of this is the names, especially Dean Snuffleupagus! The name Alienus makes me think of how illegal immigrants are treated, but not sure if that is what you were going for. Guessing you are a Harry Potter fan like me as well :)
I like silence a lot too, and I love the song "The Sound of Silence" by Simon and Garfunkel. Did that song inspire this at all? I'm autistic so I can easily get overwhelmed with stimuli of all kinds, but especially sounds. Do you deal with similar issues?
This room sounds nice. Even if it is intruded on by aspects of the city. Moalboal sounds heavenly though. I have always wanted a house that is on the seashore. Unfortunately, I've never lived close to the ocean. Maybe someday. Thank you for sharing this poem. It reminded me of how beautiful the world can be.
Nice work! I like poems that combine a child-like sound but also delve into deeper, darker subjects. Yours did exactly that. I don't know if Bella Boo is a pseudonym for yourself or entirely fictional, but coming from a highly dysfunctional family, I can relate.
I must admit I am not religious anymore, although I am still spiritual in nature. I really enjoyed this poem and can relate to the feeling of needing something greater than yourself to take over or give guidance in life. I'm glad you have your faith to fall back on during hard times.
I really like this poem. Your poetic style is similar to mine in that it is minimalistic to some extent, but powerful in effect. Reading this made me feel a bit of a shiver coming on even though it is quite warm in my room!
So true. Neither side cares about us. They are all bought and paid for, some to greater or lesser extents, but still almost all are compromised. The drug war really frustrates me because they took away legal, controlled pain medicines from those of us who have chronic pain, driving many to street drugs that kill them. Since the war on opioids started the number of people dying by overdoses has skyrocketed. The legal prescriptions that people used without abusing weren't the problem in the first place. Living in Ohio, the train derailments are a nightmare too. Luckily we aren't close to the East Palestine one, but not long ago there was another one that leaked out chemicals in Springfield which is really close to us.
Well of course the devils cheated! If the angels didn't expect that they deserve to lose! Fun little poem, I really enjoyed reading it. I always tend to side with the devils just because they seem cooler and I like a little rebelliousness :)
I feel your pain. Although I haven't been officially diagnosed, it is highly suspected I have Guillain-Barre as well. I have all the symptoms and also have another condition that is often associated with it (Ehlers Danlos). Chronic illness and pain of any kind is exceptionally hard to live with. It can drive you to the brink of madness sometimes when the flareups are exceptionally bad.
Beautiful, and I agree, curiosity and wonder are necessary for a happy, fulfilled life. The simple wonder of a child is something many of us lose and to our ultimate detriment. My only suggestion for change would be taking the word "much" out of these lines:
"Or would it be boring
With nothing much to share?"
The only reason I suggest that is I think it improves the flow a bit, but that is totally up to you. I know we all have a little bit different rhythm when we read poetry, so what flows best for one person might not work best for all.
Interesting little philosophical quandary. Personally, I lean more towards the we are God(s) who chose to incarnate to experience things we couldn't as divine beings. Kind of like virtual reality games for the Gods. The only way I can imagine a good system is if we choose to be here and endure the things we go through, otherwise it is cruel to be sentenced to some of the lives we have to live on this earth.
Very sad but too often true story. My sister died of suicide and a huge part of it was the mistreatment she received at the hands of others throughout her life, particularly those who were supposed to love and protect her. I sometimes struggle with suicidal ideation, but am grateful I've never actually tried it and hope I never do.
Beautifully written and definitely relatable. This poem makes me think of the type of sadness that comes with grief and despair, although it could easily fit the sadness of depression as well.
Sounds like Great Britain is becoming more and more like America (where I call home, even if reluctantly). I can't help but feel that most of these ills are the fault of capitalism, a beast that has outgrown its usefulness and is slowly devouring all opposition and programs that stand in the way of its profit seeking.
Amen! We agree on this for sure. I actually posted a poem yesterday called "Welcome to Fascism 2.0" with many of the same criticisms, just worded differently. It is scary to live in this country right now. And people like DeSantis are even worse than Trump in many ways. Probably because DeSantis is smarter and more effective in putting policies into effect.
Wow, I can really relate to this. As someone who went through a lot of trauma growing up and as an adult, I find myself fighting the desire to isolate myself a lot. I often feel like an outsider or observer more than a participant even when I do drag myself out to social events. Being autistic and anxious by nature certainly doesn't help me out either. Was this written from your own personal experience as well or more of a fiction piece?
I'm not sure which president you are even talking about as both presidents of the past two terms have had the other side attempt to impeach them. I definitely agree that America is in tatters though and none of the "saviors" we have turned to come close to being able or even willing to do anything to help much. Sure, they can talk good game sometimes, but look to their actions and policies and you see through it easily.
I never understood the hatred of dandelions either. They are pretty, edible, and turn into fun, fluffy toys you can play with. I also don't understand people's obsessions with grass and lawn maintenance. I like nature, wild and free much better.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.10 seconds at 8:39am on Nov 05, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My review has been submitted for consideration in "
