I love that this is original and unusual - it's not clichéd or predictable, but is entirely fantastical which makes it much more interesting to read. In the second line, a comma between eternity and maybe does not fit right; I think a hyphen would be better.
While the content of the story is fascinating, I think you could expand on the description of the emotions felt throughout it. Especially at the beginning where they first see the boats, perhaps you could detail the shock they felt a little more to highlight what an incredible moment it was.
Your writing is very descriptive for the most part; I could only suggest you try to add a little more just to pad out the story a bit. I am only saying this as I would love to read more about this story and it would keep my attention (and I think anyone else's) a bit longer.
I really like this, and I'll be looking out for more of your writing. Well done!
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