A fantastic poem, it flows wonderfully well. There is something off about the second two lines of the first stanza that I can not quite put my finger on.
The poem flows beautifully which although it seems ironic is hard to do with the stream of consciousness style. I would perhaps change some words you use peacch twice there are better words for describing skin colour, but its not that much an issue. Good poem well done.
This is a beautifully brutal poem its straight to the point. I love the use of antipathetical pairings a technique which Keats was fond of. Overall the poem has a very blood sweat toil and tears feel which I am absolutely here for.
All Writing.Com images are copyrighted and may not be copied / modified in any way. All other brand names & trademarks are owned by their respective companies.
Generated in 0.08 seconds at 9:01pm on Nov 23, 2024 via server WEBX1.
View Portfolio
Visit Notebook
Send Gift Points
Awards
Badges
Send Email
Community Newsfeed
General Discussion
Sponsored Items
Book of Trinkets
Static Items
Books
Groups
Interactive Stories
Audio
Campfire Creatives
Community Notes
Crossword Puzzles
Documents
Folders
Images
In & Outs
Madlibs
Photo Albums
Polls
Product Reviews
Quizzes
Survey Forms
Web Pages
Word Searches
My review has been submitted for consideration in "