I enjoyed reading this story - the twisting plot kept my interest as I tried to figure out what was going on with Jerry. Sad to think at the end it was all a demented illusion, or was it? Was Jerry having these "visions" from the hospital, or did some version of these events actually happen, landing him in the hospital? I like that the story is open-ended a bit, allowing the reader to puzzle over it and come up with some theories about what is going on.
Technically, I thought the writing flowed well. No grammatical/formatting mistakes that I caught. Nicely done!
Tom - I thought this was a great story! Right from the beginning I was drawn in, having had personal experience with a Ms. Taylor in my college days. I thought the story flowed well, and watching the MC self-destruct in search of the noise was like watching a slow-motion train wreck! I feel like you captured something everyone goes through at one time or another - some nagging annoyance that just drives you over the edge of rational thought - and to have it happen to a broke recent graduate was a nice play, since instead of just being a costly episode it truly destroyed his (new) life.
I thought the writing was executed well, with no grammatical or formatting errors I picked up on. I also thought the dialog was easy to follow and natural sounding.
Overall, really nice job, and I enjoyed reading your work!
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