Great job setting a bleak tone and establishing a thorough description of a world punished with an alien invasion. I also like the irony that, while greed is a fundamentally human trait, its effect on the Charr will allow humanity to survive. The only thing I would change is reducing the frequency of pronouns you use.
I really enjoy the fast-moving style of this one! The abrupt but descriptive sentences you use add speed to the narrative and give the sea a feeling of wonder and activity. However, toward the end it may be beneficial to slow the pace down a little more and lengthen your sentences.
Nice story with a creative twist at the end. I do think it could have benefitted from being longer and drawing out the suspense of the reader being unsure about the research Bob was doing. I would also expand on his backstory and motivations, where he procures the knowledge and equipment for his research, etc. Best of luck in your writing, and please be sure to check out ( and maybe review ;) ) my short story, “The Algorithm”.
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