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A good part of the style is that the sentences are generally simple and easy to read. Most of the story was easy to understand, although it sometimes included unimportant details. I liked how you varied the lengths of sentences by including both long sentences and short sentences. I will give you some suggestions on how to make the style even better in the Corrections/Suggestions section below.

You gave us information about Annie, but I think sometimes you gave us the wrong kind of information. For example, in the beginning you tell us she is popular and she liked to knit socks. We don't need to know those details for this story, since they have nothing to do with the main point of her illness. On the other hand, I would like to know more about the incident in Annie's past that she is upset about. If it is important to the story and perhaps connected to her illness, you should give us details about it.

I did enjoy Annie's interactions with Buster, and I thought their relationship was a strong point of the story. You could include even more information about them, such as the things they've been through together.

The story began in the middle of a storm, when Annie is sick and alone in the house except for Buster. It ends with Annie dying. In the middle, Annie thinks about an upsetting past event and worries that someone is hiding outside in the bushes. I would suggest taking out the part about Annie being worried about someone hiding in the bushes, since you only mentioned it once and it had no bearing on the rest of the story. As I already mentioned, I would like to know more about the event in the past. I was confused about whether it was good or bad, since at one point Annie worried about it and later she giggled about it.

My suggestion for plot is to make the middle of the story more cohesive. Tell us what actually happened in the past event and how it affects Annie's current illness. Also, the ending came as a surprise. I thought Annie was getting better, but then she died. Try making it more clear why she died, or what happened when she thought she was getting better. Once you nail down the plot, the story will have a much stronger impact on the reader.

There are many words that are technically spelled correctly but are still the wrong word.
and her waste was small.
Should be "waist"

lightening that bit into her sole
Should be "soul"

Her breathes came in deep gasps
Should be "breaths"

but she was too weaked to do that
Not sure; either "weak" or "weakened"

There are many more examples, so go through the whole thing carefully.

There are many instances of incorrect grammar and punctuation.

"Why?" screamed Annie?
Should be a period at the end

Annie was frail. But she screamed out loud in that dark and storm.
The second sentence is a fragment, and you could correct it by joining the two sentences like this: "Annie was frail, but she screamed loudly in the dark." (I took off "and storm" because it didn't really make sense.)

She was not that old and her hair was blonde turning brown and her waste was small.
The lack of punctuation made this sentence confusing to read. Here is a possible revision: "She was only sixteen and was thin. Her hair was blonde, but it was slowly turning brown."

Go carefully through the story and notice when a sentence seems odd or hard to read. Look at the books of published authors and notice how they write, and try to imitate them.

Although your descriptions were usually very creative, sometimes they were strange or out of place.
It was a stormy and dark night
Although you switched the words "dark" and "stormy", this is still very close to a cliche. Try replacing it with a description of the weather in your own words.

Annie pulled the blankets over her face in a quick and scared way.
"and scared way" was a weak word choice. Try taking it off, or rewriting the entire sentence like this: "Annie snatched the blankets over her face in fear."

She dreamed of what had happened and several times she woke up in a chilling puddle of worry. This was somewhat strange. Did she really wake up in a puddle? Here's one way to rewrite it: "She dreamed of what had happened and several times she awoke with a gasp. Her skin felt cool, as if all the blood had drained out in her worried sleep."

When you're writing a description, slow down and think about whether it would make sense to use when describing something to a friend.

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Disclaimer: This is just my humble opinion! You know what's right for your story.

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