Hmmm...I kind of liked how it began, but a thing that caught me in the second verse was how you have thorns and then you are flying. I understand you experiences transform you, but the shift in the writing is sudden and a bit jarring.
The feel of this poem is passive, reflective, and bitter. I feel it also does well to paint in generalizations a deeper story. A short poem, and it works as I see it. Only one more thing...
Regret seizes me I stand lone, a tree - perhaps his line could read 'I stand, a lone tree'
Newly washed up on the shore
I might come off as an asshole, but this is what get's a yellow folder?
Dude, these are mediocre and I think you know it. You should just post the one's that matter. Write with meaning and there will be meaning in your writing.
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